A single bullet // M.C ✔️

92

"God, I'll have to fly home once this is all done and see my family. You'll love them too, and they'll love you." Luke sighed, looking away from his Xbox, pausing the game. It had been a few days since I met Ruth and was ultimately invited into the family, even if we and Michael were to break up, which the only way that'll happen is if I die. And here I was in Luke's place, talking to him about it.

"She did say your mum missed you." I grabbed his controller, unpausing it and having a go at the level I've watched him struggle on for the last twenty minutes. "It's a good thing you're a gang member and not a professional gamer." I laughed, completing the level right away and chucking the controller back beside him, watching it bounce a few times before settling. "You're crap."

"I prefer out of practice. I haven't got my brothers to play against."

"Brothers?" I looked him up and down, leaning into the plush sofa that Kensie definitely replaced. The grey cushions were all plush, as if no one had previously sat on it, with some black and white throw pillows and a grey checkered black thrown over the arm of the sofa. Definitely Kensie.

"Yeah, I have two brothers, Nicky."

"You never mentioned this!" I yelled, pulling my knees onto the sofa and kneeling next to him, grasping at his arm. He shot me a small, disgusted look, shrugging me off brutally.

"Careful, Michael, he will flip." He grimaced, shivering at the sheer thought of it. "It's never come into conversation."

"Come on, I know about Ashtons, and he's hardly here." I whined, over-dramatically throwing myself back into the back cushions, pouting. "I just want to know." I patted the cushions, getting distracted before he could say a single word about them. "This new?" It clearly was, but I needed him to confirm it and tell me why - they had a decent one before.

"It is. Got blood on the other one, and Kensie flipped the fuck out," he smiled fondly, saving and turning his game off, letting the room fall into silence now the music wasn't playing. "But enough about that, you okay?"

"I'm fine?" I was shocked that he had asked me that; he didn't usually care. Not that he didn't care about my feelings, but he wasn't the kind of person to straight up ask out of the blue; usually, a chain of events leads to that particular question.

"No, seriously, Nicky. I'm being serious. I saw how you were in that meeting, quite distant, as if something's been playing on your mind. I'm just curious."

"I'm fine, Luke." I spoke clearer than before, nodding and brushing him away. "I don't really think you're the person I would tell if I'm not." I pressed.

"Ouch, I'm hurt." His hand was placed over his heart as he gripped the thin cotton in a fist. "I'm trying here."

"I know." Anyone with a brain and eyes could see this isn't how Luke usually is; usually, he doesn't care about other people unless it affects him, and I definitely don't affect him. Unless it's a domino effect where I affect Kensie and then he gets affected. It's just how he is and how hell always be, and no one wants him to change. What's the point? He becomes caring and overbearing and not Luke? He's liked for his bluntness and inability to fully care, and he was someone you know deep down he does care, just struggled to show.  "And I do appreciate that."

I looked over at his semi-bare walls, scanning over the photos there, a few of him and Kensie, a few of the boys, and one frame of five people.

"They're your brothers?" I gestured in the direction of the frame on the bookcase away from the others, making him nod, looking at what I was looking at.

"Yup, youngest of three."

"What are their names?" I pressed, shuffling to a more comfortable position on the sofa. I heard him sigh and close his eyes. "Don't tell me they are dead." I couldn't stop myself. After learning about Lauren, I've been waiting for another boy to say a sibling died, which is why A) they are in the gang or B) why they are against new people in the gang.

"What, no!" He looked at me, appalled, making me smirk slightly, pushing his shoulder.

"I was joking. It seemed hard to talk about." I stated, watching how his body stiffened before slouching.

"Just only Kensie knows. We're leaders who are all sorts of fucked up, Nicky. There's a lot you've done, fully know, or will understand."

"Then explain it."

"There's Ben and Jack," he didn't look at me while he spoke, keeping his ocean eyes on the frame in case it just dispersed into thin air. "They both have children though and want this life kept far, far away from them, so here I am."

"Oh Luke..." I didn't think he would say that out of everything he could have. His hand was gripped under mine as I gave an encouraging squeeze, shocked when he didn't pull away, showing me he was really trying to stay open up and not build walls up again.

"I only ever go home when they aren't around so I don't bump into them." His face was calm and content, but his eyes were swimming in emotions, "they aren't happy I'm in this. It isn't like Michael's, and Calum's. And definitely not like Ashtons where they just didn't want Lauren in it. Mine don't want me in this, so I had to I leave my brothers... they don't understand neither do my parents. But they are a little bit more laid back with it along as I keep my family out of it. You're not the only one with a sad family life,"

"Is that why you're telling me all this, Luke?"

"Within reason, you understand me, Nicky. Understand what I go through, why I'm like this. So I need you to tell me why you aren't currently okay," he looked at me with a knowing look, making me freeze and nervously playing with my fingers after removing them from his own hands, looking anywhere but the man waiting for a proper answer.

Not some bullshit. Annoyingly, I couldn't lie to him; he knew me better than I know myself when it comes to this kind of stuff.

"I'm scared," I breathed out after a good ten minutes of him waiting and me watching the seconds and minute hand turn and click around the clock behind him. "I don't know what I'm doing here, Luke. How am I meant to distract Noah? He'll hear the guns and come running or, worse, shoot and kill me. I don't want to die." My breathing picked up massively as I thought everything over in detail, watching his face twist into concern and panic.

"Calm it down, Nicky, it was just a question." His voice was full of concern as he stared me down, hands hovering in front of him as if he didn't know what to do, how to help. He's never been in this position before.

"What do I do, Luke?" I whispered, broken, feeling immense pressure suddenly swim over my body, feeling like I'm drowning. Time seemed to slow down as he just looked at me with his ocean eyes, breathing slowly.

"You know what you do, Nicky? You go in like the bad-ass you are and always have been; you go in with so much confidence and practically demand that Noah comes listening to you. You come up with some bullshit reason just until we come running. You don't have to shoot or do anything like that, just be yourself." His hand was placed on my knee, looking up at me slightly as I had moved to be looking down. "You be you."

The words hung in the air around me, allowing them to disappear.

"You think I can do that and not give anything away?"

"I think you're perfectly capable of doing that, mainly because you don't really know what's going on on our side of everything. No risk of spilling the plan." Relief filled me hearing his words; he seemed so sincere with what he was saying, like there was a hundred percent truth behind what he was saying; he believed it.

"You know you're good at this."

"Tell anyone and ill kill you myself. Got to keep up my image," he pushed my shoulder, grabbing his controller once again and booting the game back up, letting me know this conversation was over, this part of it anyway. It did help ease my nerves, help my brain calm down, and actually know what I was doing. Just be me, I can do that. I've done it all my life. As long as nothing sets Noah off, I'll be fine, and the plan will work. He never hurt me when he took me, and there were plenty of opportunities.

Ill be fine, and the worst backup plan won't have to happen.

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