babe? ● blackpink oneshots collection

ceilings - jensoo

In Jennie's POV

I took a secret glance over the driver's seat. For being the passenger princess is nice, I wondered if this could be my permanent spot: beside her, stealing glances towards her while smiling like an idiot. I thought to myself for a bit: perhaps not in this lifetime, but I really do wish so.

"You're smiling," said Jisoo. "And blushing."

Oops, she noticed.

"Is something... wrong? Is everything alright?"

I nodded quickly. Obviously, nothing was wrong, probably except for the fact that she was not mine and I wasn't hers. Perhaps.

Maybe, I was being delusional. I liked her too much, I think. I wanted her, yearned for her, longed for her... while knowing she didn't feel the same for me. She only drove me home because she was friends with my half sister, Chaeyoung, and that she took a pity on me. 

The worst part of how I felt towards her was that she never hated me. She just didn't care enough. And who am I kidding? That was one of the worst feelings you could have, other than knowing she didn't reciprocate my love.

We sat in silence. An awkward one. 

"You're always so quiet around me."

I laughed half heartedly. I took it as a light joke, knowing full well it wasn't. I talked very much freely and without hesitation, even with strangers and people that hate me. Even with my exes and the crushes I had back then, it was never a difficult task to engage in a conversation with them, although I'm lowkey an introvert. However, around her, I felt a little... timid.

Truly, I didn't know how to act around her. I wanted to be as original as possible, not concealing any part of my personality or anything I am. And I was... in a group setting. Whenever we're around with my half sister and her cousin, Lisa, we chatted like there were no bounds and limits, although I never took my way to directly to talk to her. But in a personal space with Jisoo... I really couldn't say anything.

It was quite sad, really. 

I felt a little cramped in my head space, not knowing how to talk to her. Maybe, it's her intense stare whenever she talked to me. Maybe, it was the smile that made me rethink my decisions, knowing there was no way I could deserve someone like her. Maybe, it's how much I like her that I could probably throw up if I had to experience being in another private space with her.

Too much interest really killed my brain.

"Really?"

"Well, you're loud when my cousin's around and your sister's around, but whenever there's just the two of us, it seems like... you don't like me."

I gulped. How did she even come into that conclusion?

I turned my head, fast—too fast. My hair whipped across my face, a small strand sticking to my lips. I brushed it away quickly, trying to stall for time.

"No," I said, almost too defensively. "No. I like you. I mean—" I paused. Closed my mouth. Took a breath. Restarted. "I don't dislike you."

Smooth. Real smooth, Jennie.

Jisoo raised an eyebrow, half amused, half skeptical, her eyes flicking to me before returning to the road. Her fingers tapped rhythmically against the steering wheel. She looked thoughtful, like she was trying to figure me out. Or maybe unravel the mess I had just made with my words.

"You don't dislike me," she repeated, lips quirking like she was trying not to laugh. "Well, that's reassuring."

I wanted to disappear into the car seat. Or maybe, just disappear in general.