🏳️🌈| Completed ✅ | 🇵🇭 Filipino|The High Five Barkada Serye (Book One) |
Jayveen Raye is the eldest to a family of four who doesn't let any distraction get in the way to her goals. Her determination and persistence earned not only the scholarsh...
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꧁TONI꧂
BABY Zain's question at JR took me far from the present time. He's just a kid but he blew me away. His comment, right after Steve and Eli's insensitivity of reminiscing the past, left me with opened stitches from a deep wound, in pain and emotionally miserable again.
I often wanted to be seen and be loved, and my friends gave that to me. Whenever Mom beat me for uncontrollable emotional pain, I used my friends as shock absorbers and luckily they were happy to be of service. Whenever I needed them, they were always there. I had to let it out or else I'd be in great shit as Mom was, too.
Surviving that ordeal didn't mean I am okay. I can only attest to it now. Mom's psychologist called it a post traumatic syndrome or PTSD but I call it living. Yes she had a psychologist, whom she said she needed to heal from Dad.
I know being scared to be left again by people who are able to get into my walls will always be my problem but at least I am able to live through it without asking my friends to be online or ready for my need 24/7.
I have been emotionally independent for a long time now until Erica happened and JR came to the rescue.
I am blessed, truly blessed but then I know it comes with a price. JR was a stranger who, by destiny or chances, became part of my life. And now I'm beginning to feel the emotional attachment and I could see the loose ends.
She is freely giving me the security I needed and she could freely leave me, too, whenever she would want to.
"Toni!" habol ni Steve saming dalawa ni JR bago pa kami makapasok sa kwarto ko.
"Yes?"
"Can we talk?" seryosong tanong nito. "Privately."
Nagkatinginan kami ni JR at naintindihan naman agad naming dalawa ang gustong ipahiwatig nito.
"Dito lang muna ako sa labas o kaya ay—"
"No, JR. Mauna ka na lang sa loob. Kami ang mag-uusap dito sa labas."
Mukhang gusto pa sana nitong makipagtalo pero hinayaan naman niya akong manalo sa huli.
"S-sige. Hintayin na lang kita."
Tumango ako. "Just try to rest and sleep, okay?"
Tumango lang din ito bago pumasok sa kwarto ko.
Napagdesisyonan kong sa kwarto na lang nina Mommy at Daddy kami mag-uusap ni Steve. I have a little idea as to what he wanted us to talk about and am not sure how our talk will go along.
"Tell me," utos ko nang nakapasok na kami sa kwarto.
"Now, couz, chill, all right?"
"Steve, may bisita akong naghihintay sa kwarto ko. Can you just go straight to the point?"
