I Never Told You

12

"So now what do we do?" Stacie asks as we sit in the living room for probably one of the last times. "I mean we already graduated. So now what?" She continues. I look around at all the girls. Chloe rests her head on my shoulder; Emily lays her head in Chloe's lap with her legs on Fat Amy. Stacie is sprawled out on the floor with Cynthia Rose and Flo. Jessica and Ashley cuddle up on the other couch with Lily sitting on the couch backwards I guess. Her head is hanging off and her feet are in the air. This is one of the last times we will all be together for a while.

"We move on." I sigh. "We get on with our lives and every so often we come back together and bond again. We catch up, think about the old times together and then we go. We live our lives." I tell them. It sucks that it is all ending.

"What about you, Beca?" Fat Amy asks me. "Are you going to LA or are you sticking around?" She elaborates on the question. I look at her and then at Chloe. She looks up at me and kisses the bottom of my chin.

"I am sticking around." I say smiling at Chloe. "I've got a reason to stick around, so why not keep what's good." I tell them, kissing Chloe. I earn a lot of groans from everyone else.

"God get a room." Jessica jokes considering that would be right upstairs. "Actually don't because we would hear it all and no one wants that." She says once she really has time to process what she told us to do. Both Chloe and I laugh.

"What about you, Em?" Chloe asks the new leader of the Bellas. "You ready to form a whole new group and lead them to victory and defend our title?" Chloe asks putting a whole lot of pressure on her.

"Geez Chlo, ease up." I joke with her. Emily looks up at both of us. She looks terrified. "Em, you will be fine. Just relax. Besides Chloe and I are in like walking distance from here so if you are doing that bad, we can always swoop in and save the day." I remind her.

"I just don't want to let you guys or my mom down." She admits to the group. "I mean with you two leading, you have won like crazy. What if I can't do that? I mean I can't do what you do Beca." She exclaims sitting up.

"And I told you, I will teach you how to make the arrangements and if you still don't get it, I can always do it for you." I tell her shrugging it off. I guess she is more nervous. I get it though. I had Chloe to help me lead, she has no one to help her and we are all leaving.

"Well this is getting too sad for me." Fat Amy says standing up. "I'm going to bed." She walks upstairs followed by most of the girls.

"Becs, you coming?" Chloe asks me from the bottom step. I stare at her for a while still trying to figure out how she became my girlfriend. It still doesn't feel real to me. She smiles at me with her arm reaching out for me.

"I will be up in a minute." I tell her smiling right back at her. "I promise." I add knowing that it will go a long way. Chloe hates going to bed alone hence the reason she loved when we slept in the same bed before we were dating and well we liked cuddling. Once she reaches the top step, I turn my attention to the boxes that are all waiting to go to their new homes; more importantly, the one that says Bloe. Courtesy of Amy. I rest my hand on top. In just two days, I start a completely new life; no longer a Bella but rather an intern at a recording studio.  It seems like just yesterday Chloe was barging in on me in the shower but now she walks in completely invited.

"Hey Beca." Emily says quietly from behind me. I turn around to face her. "Thank you." She engulfs me in a hug as she begins to cry a little. "Thank you so much." She whispers into my shoulder. I am little taken back but I still hug her. She pulls away from the hug still crying. "Thank you for being my substitute mom and taking care of me and finding me when I was lost on the street. Thank you for making sure I was always okay. I know you aren't the touchiest feeliest kinda person but thanks for letting me hug you and cry on your shoulder when I needed to." She says wiping the tears from her eyes.

I watch her as she wipes the tears from her eyes even when they keep coming. "Em." I sigh grabbing her face. "You don't need to thank me for anything." I tell her wiping the tears with my thumbs. "You are a sister to me and to everyone else in this house." I remind her. She nods her head.

"I know but you were the one who really took care of me when I needed it. You were just there for me as if it wasn't your sister duty. You were there because you wanted to be." She says. She finally stops crying. I take my hands away from her face. I run on hand through my hair. This is getting very emotional. I mean she is right. I was there for her because I wanted to be there not because I had to. She is like an actual little sister and I just wanted to keep her safe.

"You're right." I sigh admitting it. "I was there for you because I wanted to be. You remind me of, well, me. Maybe a little more awkward." I joke trying to lighten the mood. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay because you are a freshman and you are a very awkward person and I just thought you were adorable so I wanted to protect that. I don't know. I can't really describe why I wanted to be there for you but I just knew I wanted to." I can feel some tears threatening to show themselves. Emily seems to notice too. She cracks a smile.

"Am I about to make Beca, the badass, Mitchell cry?" She asks me laughing a little bit. I try to push her away a little bit. "I never thought I would live to see this day!" She exclaims pulling me in for another hug.

"Don't get use to that. The only girl I will cry for is Chloe on our wedding day." I say hugging her right back. "Speaking of Chloe, I believe she is waiting for me so I am going to head up to bed, alright?" I ask making sure Emily is okay before I head off to bed. She nods her head smiling. "Good night Em." I say before walking upstairs to Chloe's room.

She is sound asleep with her earbuds in. I find her phone and gently take her earbuds out. I look down to see she was listening to some of my mixes; the ones I made for her. I set the phone on the side table before sliding under the covers with her. Her hand immediately finds my waist. She pulls me close to her before she rest her head on my chest and keeps her hand wrapped around my waist. "Took you long enough." She mumbles to me. I kiss her forehead. "What took you so long anyway?" She asks me still half asleep.

"Emily wanted to talk to me about some stuff." I tell her as I play with her hair. She smiles before letting out a little yawn. "I will tell you all about it tomorrow." I whisper kissing her forehead again. "Get some sleep. We begin preparing for our new lives tomorrow." I look down at Chloe who has already fallen back asleep. I can't believe I will get to look at her every night before I fall asleep and every morning when I wake up. I will get to see her make coffee and when she is feeling good, make breakfast. I will get to watch her achieve her dreams while I achieve mine. I will see her when she is all fat and pregnant because she wants to carry our child. I will get to see her gently rock our baby when he or she wakes up in the middle of the night. I will get to see her when is exhausted and at her worse but yet she will still look her best. I will get to see her when she looks her best and know that it is all for me. I will get to spend the rest of my life with this girl and when I take my last breath, I will know that I spent my whole life loving a girl that I could only dream of. But she is real because she will either be waiting for me and or she will be holding my hand.