The Marvelous Misadventures of Sherlock Holmes

Relationship Advice

This is a conversation starting between Lestrade and John

J: *knocks on Lestrades door.* Oi, you home mate?

L: *opens door and looks down at john* hey! What's up?
J: *looks around before leaning in closer* can we talk..? In private I mean. *he says just barely above a whisper*
L: *looks confused* ugh, yea, *gestures inside* come in.
J: thank you, *steps inside lestrades house*
L: *walks into the living room and sits on the couch* so, what's wrong?
J: *stands awkwardly in the middle of the room* I've been pretty concerned about Sherlock lately.. *the nervous tick in his hand returning*
L: * pats the empty seat on the couch* sit down and tell me
J: *walks over and takes a seat* ... He's been acting odd. *he shifts in his seat holding one hand over his twitching one*
L: *raises his eyebrows* you have to be a little more specific
J: I think he might be sick.. *he breathes out honesty*
L: *thinking of some of the recent actions of sherlock, especially on halloween night* I don't think there's any disease that has those effects... But why do you think that?
J: whenever I see him, his face it a red, but soon if I turn and turn back again to look at him, he starts sweating... It's a bit abnormal..
L: *in deep thought* and this only happens around you?
J: I don't know, I'm not someone else!
L: I mean, does this happens only when you guys are alone or when your in public... Just elaborate when does this normally happens
J: it used to be scattered or every so often
J: now it seems to be getting worse
J: if he is sick, I haven't seen anything like what he has.
L: this happens in public?
J: as I know of
L: what normally happens before?
J: before he gets like that?
L: yes
J: Just *shakes head* one moment he's make deductions here and there, and then he gets like that... Maybe he's allergic to something?
L: describe one instance to me. With the events leading up to it.
J: umm.. Just the other day we were on the lookout for a man dressed up as Noel, long story, but after we lost him we decided to head back. Sherlock was just deducing the stars, can you believe it? He actually knows something about space *he says sarcastically* then another minute he's red in the face with his head down, muttering something.
L: mmmmm... Tell me another
J: well.. I know it happens when he falls asleep. He falls asleep more often now in his chair then anything.. *puzzled look*
L: how did he react afterwards?
J: mostly muttering, and sweating... I have to wake him up after he starts banging his feet on the ground... Mrs Hudson doesn't seem to appreciate it *he smiles at the thought of her yelling at Sherlock for making so much noise*
L: what dis he do after he woke up?
J: he usually just gets up apologizes for the noise and goes off to his room
L: *pulls out small notebook and pen, writing a few things down* what's his facial expression like then?
J: kinda hard to describe, actually..
L: ...
J: *ponders for a moment* it's like a... No... It's more like a... No... Listen I got no idea if he's in pain or not
L: ...what is he's facial expression like?? Not just simply thoughtful or in pain, but are his lips drawn tight, is his eyes not really focus on anything? Details
L: those small details tell me alot more
J: his eyes, when he's asleep, are squeezed shut, his lips are as you said: drawn tight. I can't tell when he walks with his head down... Sometimes he jumps in his sleep. I wonder if he's having nightmares...? *he asks mostly to himself*
L: mmm... *takes a couple more notes down* ok this may sound weird, but answer this honestly ok?
J: ...ok...
L: did he act like this when we pranked you guys?
J: *thinks for a moment* I think, I can't really remember that well... *scratches chin*
L: *raises eyebrow* you can't remember if he did anything strange? If his face got really red for no good reason?
J: well, yeah I do recall that, but think that was because I might have scared him.. *feels guilty for scaring sherlock*
L: what did he do?
J: he sorta curled up and backed away from me, I kinda feel bad for scaring him
L: and this was similar to the other instances?
J: yeah... I guess
L: *a small smile, grows on his face and he snaps the notebook shut* I know what's going on. *pats john on the back* don't worry mate.
J: huh? You do? Tell me.
L: *sigh* all I can tell you it's not a physical problem. It's a social one. And that's all I can say.
J: What? What do you mean a "social problem", and why can't you tell me anything else?
L: *laugh* you have to figure it out like the rest of us. Just believe me, don't freak out over it. *mutters* sherlock is basically a teen with his first crush...
J: *his face scrunches up in confusion as he whispers aloud* like the rest of us...?
L: everyone else figured out why sherlock is acting like this. The only one oblivious is you *slaps john on the back* and maybe even the man himself
J: ... *what could it be?* *he nods slowly before getting up*
L: so do want to the pub or something?
J: *clears his head* sure *he smiles brightly at lestrade*
L: come then *starts walking out the door grabbing his keys*
J: *he follows behind* I'll buy the first round!
S: *barges into Molly's flat* Molly? I know your here. We need to talk.... A-about John!
M: *comes out waving a frying pan* WHAT! HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE! *notice it's sherlock* oh, it's you *puts frying pan down* at least give me a little warning next time
S: We need to talk. *he demands more than he says*
M: *raises an eyebrow* ok then, lock the door and come sit down
S: *locks door and returns quickly, choosing to sit on the couch, tapping his foot nervously*
M: *sits on the couch* what's up?
S: Its John. I think he knows.
M: your going to be a little more specific cause I have no idea what you're talking about
S: I think he knows that I.... you know that L word... what is it again?
M: *trying to control her inner fangirl* like or love?!
S: Yeah that one!
M: ... I said two completely different things...
S: *tapping his foot still* Same thing, they both mean affection.
M: but they mean different things in society
S: you know that society and I don't go hand in hand.
M: ...
M: you just don't want to tell me, right?
S: do I need to answer that question?
M: *sigh* ok back to the original topic. Wouldn't that be a good think? If he figures out?
S: no, no, its all wrong! He's not suppose to figure it out... He's not suppose to- *he stops before he says the word, he goes silent for a moment*
M: *gently place a hand on Sherlock's hand and smiles gently at him* you do know there is a high chance he feels the same the way. And if he finds out you like/love him, he might return those feelings? And if he doesn't, which is basically impossible, you can move past the point of not knowing, and being stressed out all the time
S: *looks at the floor in silence*
M: or he might realize that he wasn't feeling a strong friendship, but even stronger emotions?
S: should I... Should I just tell him?
M: well, the best way to figure out... Ok, so answer these questions. How long have you been feeling this way?
S: I don't know, since john shot the cabbie murder... I didn't think it was.. You know...
M: ok. This is the important one, would you tell him now if he would never figure out your feelings?
S: ... I- I don't think I could do that... Not now... *not ever*
M: why?
S: all I can say... Bad timing. Very bad timing*
M: if you really want me to give good advice, you're gonna have to be specific
S: *sighs* I'm not worth the time *he says quietly, mostly to himself*
M: *raises eyebrow* for god sake, it will be quicker if you just told me
S: *gives her a genuine look of shock. This was hard on him, harder than the best man speech*
M: *waits patiently for him to say something*
S: I don't need this Molly *stands up and begins to walk to the door*
M: *does nothing to stop him* just be honest with him and yourself.  Don't over think everything. *smiles* speak your feelings and you will be free. Good luck Sherlock.
S: ... *he stands in the doorframe before leaving*
M: *jokingly* well leave or stay, don't just stand in the door or Toby might try to escape
S: *he calls softly over his shoulder* ...thank you Molly...
S: *he leaves and closes the door behind him*
M: *sigh* I hope he gets his stuff together...
J: *getting out of a cabbie, paying and thanking him before walking down Baker Street, (north side)
S: *walking down south side of Baker Street*
The rain begins to fall from the weeping skies
J: shit, *begins to walk faster, trying to beat the rain*
S: *feels the rain, but doesn't quiet acknowledge it exists. His mind is somewhere else.*
Both J and S are walking down the street towards each other.
J: *unknowingly passes 221 b. The rain pelting him*
The rain begins to pour down in buckets'
S: *walking with his head down, letting the rain cry on him* I wish I could... *he whispers before he crashes into something*
J: *knocked to the ground by another tall person. He goes to give the man a piece of his mind when he sees its sherlock* Sherlock? *he peers through the rain*
S: *realizing it was John he quickly gets him to his feet, and deduces that he didn't bring an umbrella. Sherlock all but sighs as he removes his coat and plops it on John, protecting John's head and his upper body with his black trench coat*
J: *with sherlock's coat on his head by surprise he asks* What are you-?
S: I don't want you to get ill. *he says plainly before continuing his trek to 221 b*
J: *a faint red dust on his cheeks form* O-oh.. I see.. *he pretends to understand*
J: hey wait! *he jogs holding the trench coat over his form*
S: *doesn't turn to look at John, just knowing that the scene behind him will make john...*
J: *throws the trench coat over sherlock*
S: Huh? I thought- *he interjects*
J: *wiggles under the coat with sherlock, wrapping one arm around sherlock and another holding the coat around his own form* *he looks up at his best friend and smiles* I don't want you getting "ill" either, Sherlock..
S: *he smiles, looking at the doctor* I thought you were a soldier? *he teases*
J: if that's what you want me to be.. *he stares quietly*
S: *locks eye contact with john, leaning in slowly*
S: *his heart pounds in his chest at these words. Of course they never mean what sherlock thinks they mean*
J: so you have to stay at least a little bit dry. *he emphasizes the little, as he walks closer to Sherlock* Doctor's orders!
S: *he smiles, looking at the doctor* I thought you were a soldier? *he teases*
J: if that's what you want me to be.. *he stares quietly*
S: *locks eye contact with john, leaning in slowly*
S: *rests his head against Johns*
J: *his face goes red, and he realizes that they've stopped walking and a small crowd has gathered around them. Staring*
Random person: *whisper* is that, Sherlock Holmes?
Random 2: and John Watson?!
Random 3: I need to take a picture of this for tumblr!!
S: *mumbles* John...
J: *huh? *he turns back to sherlock*
J: *he can only imagine how dramatically romantic this is. One lover holding the coat over his/her shorter partner. The shorter looking up into his/hers partners eyes lost in romance, the other with the same look. All that and the rain tricking around them*
All 3 random people: *silently fangirling*
S: john... *he repeats an air of question in his voice*
J: *swallows* ...ya sherlock...?
Random 4: *appears and joins the other 3* what's going on..? *he whispers*
Random 3: *covers random 4's mouth, whispering* a ship is sailing and help me god if you scare it away
Random 4: *moves 3's hand off mouth* you make it sound like there deer *He whispers*
Random 1: I learned long ago to just go along with her gibberish
Random 3: *giggles but then stops her self whispers* shush everyone don't talk. stalker mode, engage
S: *nudges John's forehead*
J: hey!
S: *smiles and try to direct johns head to the crowd by nudging him again*
J: Oi, stop that!
Random 3: *silently awwing*
Random 4: *trying not to squeak, being the fully grown man he is, he bites his tongue*
Random 2: *rolls eyes but smiles at the adorableness*
S: *his eyes try to direct john into the direction of the 4 awkward citizens watching. when it doesn't work, he nudges him a bit harder*
J: *aggravated and grumpy, he looks at sherlock with threat in his eyes* do that one more time...
S: *straightens up a bit*
Random 3: *adjusting her hand goggles* what is going on? *runs around the other 3 to try to get a good view* I can't hear anything!
Random 2: well, 1 those aren't really goggles, you're using your hands. 2, goggles doesn't help hearing
Random 3: *pouts* you're no fun..
Random 4: hey, there's a rumor going around that S is fancy of J when he's angry at him. *thinks: I don't blame him* *wiggles eyebrows*
Random 3: OMG! I heard of that but I didn't believe it!
Random 1: shush, let's see
J: *grumbles at Sherlock* you can't just head butt people sherlock, especially *rubs his head where sherlock nudged him a little too hard* when there shorter than you
S: I was nudging you actually.. *he said a bit quieter*
J: that was a head butt!
S: *goes quiet and a red dust begins to form*
Random 4: oh.. my... god.. it was true
Random 3: *snapping photos like crazy* less talk more pictures
J: don't give that look.
S: what look *he questions* my i know whats going on here face?
J: no, your "I'm innocent" face *he growls
S: *raises eyebrows* I'm capable of that face..? *he murmurs*
J: *barely hears him* yes, you do
S: *blush gets darker, his blood now moving in two different directions*
Random 3: I... Need a... Better... View! *climbing on top of random 1 and pushed him forward* get closer my steed and shied
Random 1: will you ever make sense *takes a couple steps forward before stoping*
Random 4: both of you, shut up! *he whispers loudly*
Both of them audibly snap their mouth shut
J: *shakes his head before noting sherlocks red face* hey.. you ok?
S: huh..? *he says, his legs shaking slightly. he wanted to curl up in a ball, hide his shame forming* *don't think of john in my bedroom, don't think of john in my bedroom- damn it!*
J: Sherlock? your face is red again... Are you feeling well lately? *moves hand to put on Sherlock's forehead*
Random 4: *jaw drops, noting sherlocks posture curling over slightly.*
Random 3: *squinting* wha?
Random 4: he's actually aroused... *he whispers*
S: *moves away from johns hand*
Random 2: *shaking head in disbelief*
J: come now sherlock *he put his hand on sherlocks forehead*
S: *flinches having Johns hand on his forehead. he closes his eyes, fearing that his shame would be found out*
J: your really warm sherlock *moves his palm to sherlocks cheek*
S: *opens eyes slightly* w-wha?
J: *looks up at the sky, then back to sherlock* its not safe for you to be out here *his hands now both on either side of sherlock's face*
S: *his trench coat slips out of one of his hands, admiring John so close*
Random 4: picture, now
Random 3: *haven't stopped taking pictures* already on it
Random 4: i ship it *he whispers hands covering his mouth*
Random 3: *looks at him in shock, and whisper yells* where the fuck have you been? I- and the entirety of tumblr- have been shipping it!
Random 4: shut it! My internet is shite! *he all but growls*
Random 1: shush you two
J: *feeling the rain on his head and notices sherlock's let go of the coat* Oi! The coat man, the coat! *he picks up the other end of the coat and covers them again.* *he sighs, shaking his head* It's not good for you to be out in the rain while your sick sherlock.
S: *murmurs apologizes that are barley audible*
J: Come on, lets go *he smiles* *guiding sherlock to the flat*
S: *he follows close behind before catching up* your going the wrong way... *he whispers* you've already passed our flat a ways back
J: o-oh.. *he sounds a bit embarrassed*
Random 4: just kiss him already *he whisper yells*
Random 2: shush. We must be silent observers so we don't distract them or make them feel awkward
J: *ears pricking up, he looks about*
S: What is it?
Random 4: shit..!!! *he whispers*
Random 3: *whispers* act natural!
Random 1 and 2 starts a discussion about work
Random 3: *runs around random 4 like a small child*
Random 4: Oi, stop that!
Random 3: YOU SHALL NEVER STOP ME!!
J: Lets walk quickly, shall we? *he says looking over at the odd 4 people*
S: agreed, *he moves John to the correct direction of the flat*
Random 4: YOUR A BLOODY PSYCHOPATH!!!
S: *turns to the person who gave the name, odd that it wasn't him that the insult was for*
Random 3: A HIGH FUNCTIONING SOCIOPATH! With your number *smiles cheekily*
S and J both go wide eyed and make a run for the flat
S: THEY FOUND US
J: NO SHIT!
Random 4: really?
Random 4: Really?!
Random 3: *looks at the two running away loudly squeals* OMG OMG!! I'm gonna be tumblr famous for these pictures! All 1264 of my followers will love me!!!
Random 3: oh and yes. Yes
S and J run into 221 and pant, breathlessly
J: do *gasp* think they'll... *inhales*
S: follow..? hopefully no *he shakes his head bent over breathing hard*
J: *when he catches his breath* I have a feeling that we made 4 new enemies today
S: *nods in agreement, still catching his breath* how did you..?
J: recover so quickly? *he puffs out his chest* been going to the gym lately!
S: good *gasp* for you.. *he stares down at the floor*

FOXES HERE

feeling like shit and sick,

sorry for any miscalculations in the text!