Sanctuary (A Dan Smith/ Bastille fanfic)

66. Chloe

I breathe in the sea air, feeling happy and content with life right now.

I'm in my favourite place in the world with my favourite person in the world. What could be better? Sure, I could be a millionaire and own a house in every country, and sure, my boyfriend could not be off on tour for the next 4 months, but that would be me being greedy and so I'm totally happy with where I am right in this very moment.. Although adding an extra few 0's to my bank balance couldn't hurt I suppose. Cheeky of me, I know, but bills have got to be paid and a girls gotta eat.

Dan seems to share my happiness as he gently grasps my hand and rubs his rough thumb over my knuckle, an action so simple yet so soothing. One that could send me to sleep but at the same time could send shivers running up my spine.

"What time is your flight tomorrow then?" I wince as I think of him leaving.

"Not until late evening so I've got plenty of time to get back up to London." Dan shuffles closer and wraps his arm around my shoulder, a gesture that I'm grateful for as I'm starting to feel cold from the sea breeze. "First gig is on Tuesday though, so going to be nice and busy." He groans in thought of his hectic schedule.

"No rest for the wicked, hey?" I quote the famous saying.

"Mmhmm." He mumbles and we fall silent again. Dan barely sits still as he shuffles in his space on the wooden flooring of the pier. I let him change his position a few times before giving him a disapproving look, hoping that it will cause him to stop being such a fidget.

"Dan sit still!" I finally moan before he begins to agitate me further.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I just.." He trails off, not finishing his explanation.

"What's up?" I turn my body and cross my arms in question.

"Well.. I.." He looks genuinely nervous as he fumbles for his words. I can't think of what it is that he is struggling to say so badly, but I want him to speak his mind. "I was just going to say, do you fancy going home as I'm starting to get cold?" He sighs and looks down, rubbing his forearm with his hand.

"Yeah.. Sure." I speak hesitantly, knowing that this wasn't really what Dan had to say. He can be so confusing sometimes, but I know it can sometimes be hard for him to talk his mind, so if going home is what he wants to do, then I will do it for him.

I stand up first and hold my hand up to help Dan up, when something falls out of his pocket and rolls onto the floor. He doesn't notice it at first, instead he carries on standing up and brushes the dust off his jeans, so I pick it up and hold it out for him to take. It's a tiny dark blue velvet bag, so small you could probably only keep a couple of coins in it or a piece of jewellery.

"Shit." I mutter as I realise what's inside after recognising the feel of the object that I can't see. It's unmistakable that it's a ring.

"Shit." Dan repeats and gasps as he eyes what's in my hand. I can't see inside but judging by the look in his eyes, it's exactly what I think it is. Or at least, the ring has the exact same meaning that I have assumed that it has.

"D..Dan?" I stutter, hoping that there is some sort of reasonable explanation for this. Maybe it's someone else's? Yeah, maybe it's a friends. Chris's maybe? I try to convince myself but panic, knowing that my first guess was in fact correct.

"I was... I was going to.. But then I.. Fuck." Dan rubs his palms on his forehead before wincing at me. "I'm hardly Mr. Smooth, am I?"

"No.. Here, it's fine." I push the bag into his hand and try to shake off whatever has just happened between us. Maybe if I ignore what has just happened, it won't be brought up again.

"Chloe, wait." Dan says before I get a chance to walk away. "I wanted to ask you something a minute ago but I wimped out like the loser I am." I try to protest and tell him not to worry, that I am actually cold and want to go home too. So let's go home and have a nice cup of tea to warm us up. But I can't. I'm paralysed on the spot, my jaw slightly open in shock. MY silence only leads him to continue further. "I'm sorry this isn't the fairy tale that you deserve but... " And now all of a sudden he gets down on one knee. Panic rushes through me as I attempt but fail to prepare for this moment. "Chloe, I don't need to tell you how much I love you, because you know that I do, but I want to. I want to see you smile when you hear those words, I want to make you feel loved in every single way, I want to be the one to make you smile and feel loved. And if you'll allow me I want to be there for you for the rest of our lives, whether we're in the same country or not. Because we've tried it and we sure as hell know that we cannot stay apart. So Chloe Annabelle Hart, will you marry me?"

"Dan." I have to remember to breathe as a tear forms in my eye. I can't bear to look at him any longer, seeing him on the ground like that is breaking my heart, just like I'm about to do to him. I don't think that I can say it, but prolonging this is only going to make this more horrendous for him as well as for myself. "No."