Barred (nh au)

Prologue

HALEY'S POV:

"Same time tomorrow, Haley!" My boss called out as I made my way out of the coffee shop I work in.

"I'll be on time, Mrs. Mason!" I called back, flashing her a smile.

I walked on the sidewalk, my smile fading as I got immersed in my own thoughts. The only time I let my true self come up was this, when I was alone. I wrapped my jacket tighter around my body, hugging myself for extra warmth.

I reached my house, opened the door and walked in, "Hey mum! I'm home!" I called out. But when I got no response, I sighed. They were gone again.

I went to the kitchen, and just as I expected, there was a note on the counter, the neat handwriting of my mother easily recognizable:

'Dear Haley,

Me and your dad had to leave again for work related reasons. We're so sorry we couldn't inform you or spend more time with you.

We'll be back soon.

We love you, sweetie. Take care.

Mum, x.'

I tore the letter and threw it in the dustbin as soon as I read it. My parents and I very well knew that their 'soon' would be at least 2 months long. At least. This always happens. They come home for like, 3 days, and then leave again without informing whatsoever. And then don't return for weeks at a stretch. But I never complained.

I know I could've moved out easily, since I'm 19 and all but I never felt like it. Living like this was almost like I was living alone, on my own. And then my parents say they love me. Like if they really did they wouldn't just leave me like that. Is work really more important than their own daughter?

I sighed, grabbing some leftover pizza from the fridge and heating it up. I should've gotten used to this behavior by now, but I never could. Every time they left like that, it was like a stab to my heart. They never really appreciated whatever I did in life. Of course they support me, but I have never really heard them say it.

And then there are so many people in my life, including my parents, for whom I do so much. I shower them with all the love I have, trying to sort out whatever is wrong and helping them out the best I can. But all I ever got in return was shit being thrown right back at me. But I smiled through it all. I stayed strong.

People say that nothing is wrong in my life. My friends, family, colleagues, all think that my life is perfect. No worries, always happy, always smiling. But they don't really know anything. I have never been good at expressing emotions. I have always put up a facade, a mask, an act.

They don't know I smile to hide away all the sadness, the hurt buried inside me. The hurt of not being loved or rather, not feeling loved enough.

It's not that I'm unloved. My friends and family always tell me that they love me, but I know they don't really mean it. Or even if they do, their show of love is next to invisible.

I didn't know what it was really like to feel loved. I had started to feel as if I'm barred from being loved.

Until he came along.

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Happy New Year everyone! I hope 2016 is an amazing year for all of you!

As promised, the journey of Barred officially begins! I'm so excited to share this story with you!

Please vote and comment and send out your thoughts to me!

Much love,

Xxxx.