Barred (nh au)

XXXV. Explanation(s)

Trigger warning: this chapter deals with some sensitive topics. The names of the said topics haven't been mentioned, but it's not difficult to figure it out. Read at your own discretion.

If you ever have had to go through something like this or are going through it right now, talk to someone about it. Know that it's okay and that I'm here for you. You can always talk to me. You're not alone. You never are x

NIALL'S POV:

I wasn't paying attention to the television. In fact, I wasn't paying attention to anything at all. The TV was on in front of me: a sports channel showing golf. Usually, that would have had me engrossed, but I was so busy wallowing in my sadness, I didn't even notice. Louis was there, occasionally glancing at me and sighing when I didn't respond.

He had come back here with snacks like he promised. He tried, multiple times, to get me interested in something or the other, but I was just not into it. I really appreciated Louis for trying and helping, but I was not going to be able to cooperate with him. He caught on after a while and just resorted to glancing at me from time to time to make sure I didn't die or something.

I sat there quietly and decided to scroll through my phone. That was a terrible idea, because as soon as my home screen lit up, I wanted to break down all over again. It was that selfie of me and Haley when we had ice cream all over our faces. She was laughing into the camera and I was looking at her, laughing, in complete adoration. My heart broke once again just by looking at it.

I threw my phone back on the couch and just then, the doorbell rang.

"That must be Alyssa." Louis said as I walked up to open the door.

And indeed standing at the door was Haley's best friend. She
saw me, looked me up and down for a second and immediately pulled me into a hug. I returned it.

"Oh, Niall...you're being so hard on yourself." Alyssa whispered, a pained looked on her face.

I just shrugged in response. She rubbed my shoulder, giving me a small smile before proceeding to hug Louis.

"So, Alyssa, Louis here, says you want to talk to me about something. What is it?" I got straight to the point.

"Yeah...it's, uh, it's about Haley." Alyssa said, avoiding eye contact for a bit.

"It's alright. I figured that already." I tried to gave her a small smile, but I'm pretty sure that made me look like I was having a seizure.

"Niall, Alyssa, I've got to go somewhere for a bit. I'll be back in a few hours. Is that okay with you?" Louis asked, mostly asking me.

"Sure mate, thanks for everything." I gave him a hug and he patted my back before going out of the door.

"So, Niall...how do I say this? Um, you need to understand that Haley didn't leave because of you. Trust me. It wasn't you. She...she's had a lot going on off late. Problems I'm in no position to speak about. Niall, believe me when I say that she loves you. She just doesn't know it yet. Its clear as day on her face." Alyssa said.

"You do realize that's kind of hard to believe, right? Considering she didn't really reciprocate my feelings at the park." I stated and she sighed.

"Niall, let me explain. I won't tell you much about it. I have no right to. It's something Haley only has the right to talk to anyone about. If she wants to tell you about the who's and what's and how's, it's at her own discretion. I will not be disclosing anything. I'm gonna tell you from my point of view. What I saw." She began and I nodded.

"It was...it was a few years ago. You weren't in the picture at that time. Let's just say, Haley went through...a phase. A very, very difficult time in her life. She wouldn't eat, she wouldn't talk, she wouldn't sleep. Her grades were plummeting, she kept getting paler and paler. She skipped school almost three days a week. She had bags under her eyes. It was horrible to see her like that, not knowing what was happening." Alyssa whispered, visibly shuddering at the memory.