Lost in Dallas [COMPLETED]

28.

CAMERON

''Seriously? She said that? What a bitch'', said Gilinsky taking another bite of his grilled cheese sandwich as we sat in the living room and i turn the tv to watch a movie or something. Skipping channels on the tv and sighing because there wasn't anything interesting in the tv to watch until G. told me leave the FOX channel. There was a movie of James Bond there and i remembered how much he like James Bond so i turned the volume up a little, enough for G. and i to hear yet not waking up Nash who was still passed out in G's bedroom.

Thinking about my conversation with G. earlier. He called her a bitch, i should have defended her at the moment i guess but i didn't. In other case i'd have defended her but and something inside me wanted me to i just didn't found the right reason to do it. She didnt' even let me explain myself and she even had the courage to tell me she 'loved' Chris. She had the courage to yell at me when i tried to mumble he's not the person she think he is. Probably if i wouldn't have left she'd still be mine or probably he'd have got in between as he always did in with every girl i talked to in college. Chris is not who she think she is and something inside me is craving desperately to prove that to her.

Something inside me want to pull out all the things i know about Chris. I'm sure she'd leave him if i tell her all i know, but no, she made it clear that she doesn't want me in her life. She made it so clear. So clear her words keep dancing around my head fucking me over and over.

I only stop thinking about it when im asleep and still, she's on my dreams. She's always on my dreams. Smiling, dancing, enjoying every tiny piece of life; grabbing the sky with her two tiny hands and pulling the sun into a hug; she's always happy but i'm not the reason of her happiness. There's another man by her side. Another tall, brown haired man with so, so many secrets and i'm the only one who knows them all.

That man used to be my best friend. We used to share everything. Even girls, at times. We partied every weekend. We also smoke and drank, a lot... We used to be the best mates since kinder-garden, we grew up together, and until half of the end of senior year we decided to go separe ways.

He decided not to go to college, he wanted just to stay home, 'chilling', like he liked. His parents didn't gave a fuck actually. They were to caught up with work to even give a shit about Chris. He had his trust fund released earlier anyways. That was another thing. At the age of 17 he got his trust fund and he was rich. A lot of rich. He was probably the only guy in our group of friends that had money. We all were middle class or just had parents that worked really hard to give us everything we needed.

That was my case. Me, my mom and my sister had a good life. We didn't had any difficulties and i was grateful. In summer i used to work to help my mom until she told me she doesn't needed me to help her, that i should go and live my life as a teenager; that i should go to parties, have fun, hang out with my friends, go shopping and that sort of things teenagers did those days; i disagreed. I wasn't working just because we probably needed the money or just because i felt guilty seeing my mom work her ass off 'till midnight to pay my tuition and my sister's; those situations influenced, of course, but that wasn't the only reason. I really liked to work. I really liked to he useful and to feel someone needed me to do something. I really liked working hard and earning my own money even though i used to gave all my profits to my mom.
My friends told me they were proud of me. Some of them followed my steps, i even got them a work in the same coffee shop i worked at that time as a waiter. But not Chris, Chris was so full of shit at the moment he eve mocked me for working. He said i was being ridiculous. He even pulled a dramatic scene in the coffee shop just because i told him i wasn't going to a party because i had to work. He got so pissed and that was the first time i started realizing we shouldn't be friends at all.