Forever December[2011 Watty Awards]

Forever December: Chapter 21: News

*Forever December*

*Chapter 21: News*

I opened my eyes to the beeping of the machines that surrounded my son. I knew the sound, and I knew that it wasn't good. The long, hard beeping the signalized that my son was dying. Doctors rushed in before I could scream for help.

I was forced to just stare as Rowan was worked on. That was until a nurse tried to pull me out of the room. I struggled, “Rowan! No! Let me be with my baby!”

“Ma'am, no. You have to wait outside.”

I sobbed softly, but allowed her to pull me from the room. I sat in the waiting room as the nurse tried to comfort me. That didn't work.

Around me, people stared. I wanted to scream at them; tell them to stop.

My Mom had heard from someone about what had happened, and she came to sit with me. She wrapped her arms tightly around me. “Mommy's here, baby.”

When I looked up again, I saw him. My dad. He looked like he had been crying as well. He took a few steps towards me. “I'm so sorry, Dee,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around me. I felt safe with both of my parents holding me. I sighed in content, closing my eyes. Maybe Rowan would be okay. No...he would be okay. There was no doubt about it.

I was happy that my dad held me. I didn't know what I'd do if he wasn't there. I wanted to see Rian as well, but I didn't think she should be here. I didn't want to leave Rowan either, though. My heart was hurting from separation from both of my babies.

He rocked me and kissed my forehead, telling me over and over that everything would be okay.

The doctor soon came out of the room that Rowan had been in. Parker had shown up at the same time. “Dee....” he trailed off. I didn't say anything. He was his son, he should be there as well as myself.

“I'm sorry, Miss Turk....” The Doctor said quietly. I stared at him, questioning his apology. Then it dawned on me.

“No...Not my baby, no. He's okay right? He's stable...?”

The Doctor wouldn't meet my eyes. I looked from all of my family, to Parker. “What are you trying to say?” He cut in.

“Your son...he's dead,” he whispered softly. “I'm sorry for your loss.”

Tears welled in my eyes at first. I pulled my knees up to my chest before they actually burst.

*Parker's P.O.V.*

I stared blankly at the Doctor. Your son...he's dead. I never thought I'd hear those words from anyone's mouth. I blamed myself, and I knew that Dee did too. I didn't blame her. I was a horrible person for what I did.

“This is all your fault!” December screamed, throwing punches at me. Her dad held her back, whispering words of comfort to her. He looked like he needed to be comforted as well. His auburn hair, the same color as Dee's, was dripping with sweat. His face was puffy and red from crying.

Dee's mom was the same. She held her arms out for her daughter, who refused them. “I don't want you here! Go away, this is all your fault!” December screamed at me once again.

I could feel tears running down my cheeks. It was true, it was all my fault. I didn't deserve to be here. Rowan should have been here, and I should have died. I could have protected him. I should have. But, I hadn't, and I couldn't change what happened.

I couldn't say sorry anymore. There was no use. Sorry was for when he was still alive, now my son is dead. My chest began to tighten. I didn't want to cry, but I couldn't help it. I'd grown a bond with my son, now I'd killed him.

“You're going to need to arrange a funeral soon. I'll call the home,” the Doctor said quietly before leaving. Everything went downhill from there. Curse words were thrown at me, as well as punches and screams. December went crazy.

“You killed him! You killed my baby! You didn't care about him!”

I let it come. I didn't care anymore. Nothing mattered. The only thing that mattered was that I still had a little girl. I could go right with her, still. That is, if December would still let me.

“Dee, honey, calm down. You need to calm down,” her Mother said to her, pulling her to sit down. December sobbed and held onto her mom. She was the only thing that was keeping her sane right now.

I stood up. I couldn't take it anymore. This wasn't something I could handle. I needed someone to comfort me.

So I went home, to my parents. They were home for once. I curled up in my mom's arms, telling her everything that happened. She soothingly stroked my hair, whispering that everything was okay. Throughout the three months that the twins had been born, my parents had seen them once or twice. They hadn't built a bond with them at all.

“Baby boy, it'll be okay,” my mom whispered to me. I held onto her like I used to when I was a little kid. My dad came in and raised an eyebrow.

“What's wrong with you?”

My mom told him as I cried some more. I felt like a little kid again. I wished that I had been the one to die. I couldn't stop thinking that. Why not me, and not him?

I didn't have the answer.

No one did.

All I knew was that Rowan was dead, and I was close to the same.

Okay, so this isn't exactly as long as I wanted the chapter to be, but it's something. Yes, Rowan is dead, no he's not coming back at all. I wanted to take this time to point out something.

This is based on a true story. The story of my friend, who lost her son in a car accident, who was a twin.

Their names were Jeremiah and Peyton. She doesn't know I took her story and made it my own. I hope she doesn't mind, though. I want to show the world things do happen, even to babies.

Something terrible happens to everyone, some are just worse than others.