Letters

Letter 29

Dear Louis,

When you love somebody with all you got, you just shower them with the happiness and the affection you have without worrying that you might run out of it when you need to love yourself to keep from falling into the pit of darkness.
And if that person leaves, you're left with an empty heart and no memory of how you made it through life without them. That's what has happened to me, Louis.
It's all in front of me like a picture as clear as the day today.

The thing that I learnt after I made sense out of all the things that have happened to me over a few months and the therapy sessions is that time is not going to help heal the wounds that have been opened and bleeding for so long. I need to save myself as the days go by not break myself till nothing is left of me.

I guess wishing that somebody would look at how torn you are and stich your lost pieces back with some patchwork that you'll be grateful for is hopeless. I don't think anybody else can pick me up from where I am and save me. I have to do it myself, soon.

You can't just throw your hands up and hope for the best, can you?

After all the storms I have walked through and the times that I have cursed my flawed stars, there's this ray of hope that lets me hold on to all the joys I wished to give up long back.

I haven't been in the right minds lately but, I'm being told that doing what makes me happy is essential so, that I'm able to grow out of the saddest phase in my life without anybody's help.

I would be forever grateful to Harry and I love how he easily drops anything at the moment just so he can hear me rant about how bad my day was or how much I miss you.
I don't have anything to give him, as a friend. I'm grateful that he's with me but, I'm terrible at showing it. I got to know him better and now, I see why you admired and valued his friendship so much. He really is a great friend.

I went to work today and tried to keep a smile on my face. For the first time in months, I succeeded. Mrs. Green said this is what will help me heal. I need positive vibes.

I'll never quit writing letters to you. In a way, they keep me sane.

Yours Truly,

Freya.

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