S/HE

Funeral

Bitch, I'm back. I'm not gonna die that easily. Oh, did I forget to mention that I fell 15 foot high to a 12 foot sea. And I can swim. They were so stupid enough to fall for it. They are so so so so mother fuckin' stupid that they had a funeral, WITHOUT MY BODY! But wait. It wasn't my funeral. It was for the woman that I took the funeral dress from. No, but they still threw a funeral for me, WITHOUT MY BODY! They were saying words about me.

"I NEVER LIKED HER. I WAS ONLY KISSING HER ASS, THE FIRST WEEK I MET HER. BUT SHE HAD NO ASS, SO IT WAS VERY HARD FOR ME TO DO IT. SHE WAS A COLD-HEARTED BITCH WHO JUST WON'T DIE. AND NOW THAT SHE HAS, THANK THE LORD!" my dad's fiance said in my funeral.

And he called me, "cold-hearted". How dare that bitch! I was about to sneak up to him and scare him but no. I'm saving a dramatic entrance and exit. So, I just stayed there and watch them talk about me.

"She was my sister. My only sister. And I loved her. In a sisterly way because I'm gay, I suck dicks. Anyways, even though she wasn't related to me in blood, she's still be important to me inside. She will always be my sister!" Liam said.

He was only saying that because I'm dead now. He is actually happy that I'm dead so, he can start having sex with Jason everywhere in the house. But trust me, if they start having sex in my bedroom, I'm going to kill both of them! But wait, Jason is about to talk and I think it's going to be sexy and hot.

"Jerrica was a..... crazy bitch who can't stop following me and who can't stop trying to fuck with me. This girl is a fucking psychopath. Before she died, she even begged me to love her. Like she was so desperate that it's funny. I was happy that she died because now I can finally live without a stalker. Not the be rude, but I hope she's burning in hell right now! Amen!" Jason said.

I can't believe he said that about me. It's true. But he said it without a heart. He is related to my dad's fiance. They're both cold-hearted gay bitches. He is no longer in my hot boys' list. He is also not in my want to suck his dick list. And my want to have kids with him so, I could fuck the kids that look like him list. We are so OVER. Even though we were never ON. But still we are OVER. The little girl from the restaurant was next. I didn't even know why she came in my funeral!

"Hi, I'm Bea. I'm here because I want to say goodbye to the most ugliest, sinful, loneliest, but saddest girl in the world. I was there when everything happened to her and I felt really bad. But I still want to thank her because it was the best dinner and a show ever. They really entertained me with all these crazy shits that happened to them. Oh I'm sorry, my mom is here, I can't say that word, 'SHITS'. Whatever, I'm really sorry that she died. I was hoping that she could have more painful experience and perform it in the restaurant again. What a sad life she has. Oh well, AMEN!" she said.

I was both happy and sad about that little girl's speech. I don't even know her but it was so good. But bad at the same time. Now, my dad is next.

"I'm Jerrica's dad..." my dad said.

"We know that!" my classmate said.

"Okay!" my dad said.

"You're the one who likes Kiss, Suck, Swallow and BBC" my classmate said.

"Hey, if you actually played it, it's actually really fun and tasty! Whatever, Anyways. I'm devastated to find my daughter being killed.. by herself. And I really want to say sorry to her for being such a bad father. I should have been more considerate and understanding with her. I just hope that she was still here" my dad said.

"I don't!" my dad's fiance and Jason said.

I was so touch by my dad's speech but he was just acting with those fake tears. And he is a bad father like, who has gay sex in front of your children! And he is right. I'm still here. They just don't know it.

Note: Plans to hurt. Plans to hit. Plans to..... (Nah I won't tell you, even though I don't know who you are)