The Heartbreaker (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 28

After the talk with Niall and he stopped crying he went back in his room and as soon as my head hit the pillow I was gone. Seems like I still can't get a good night of sleep without nightmares.

I find myself on my surfboard again. I look around but there is no one. The boys aren't even on the beach and it is awfully quiet.

"Louis?" I try calling his name but no one answers.

"Liam? Niall? Zayn? Anyone?" I try again louder this time but once more, no one answers, it's as if I was the only person left on the earth.

The silence that engulfs me is kind of scaring me now and I try and swim on the surf board and get back closer to the beach but it doesn't work. I can't move. I try and swim as much as I can but the surf board doesn't budge. Suddenly I feel like someone grabs my ankle and pulls me into the water. I fight and struggle but whatever grabbed my ankle has a strong grip on it and is pulling me deeper and deeper into the dark waters. I struggle to get out of its hold and when I look down to see what is bringing me down I see so many hands. It's like the whole world is there and I hear those voices again. The ones in my head that had seem to disappear for a while but now I hear them, loud and clear. I try and cover my ears but they are still shouting in my head.

You're fat

Ugly

Worthless

No one will ever love you

Kill yourself

Suddenly as I look down again I see him. Louis. He stops when he notices I have seen him and comes closer to my face. I wanna cry out but I can't and my lungs are burning for air but I don't move or fight. Louis seems to be like floating beside me and we stare at each other for a bit. I start to get weak and my eyes are shutting from the lack of air. This feeling seems oh so familiar. I feel him cup my cheeks and last thing I know his lips are on mine. It's like he is breathing air into me, saving me. Our lips move in sync as I feel myself kissing back. I don't realize it but while we are kissing Louis slowly brings us back to the surface, breaking the grasps everything else had on me. Then he breaks the kiss. I gasp for air and after a few minutes my breathing gets back evenly and I look around but Louis isn't there anymore. He disappeared, I look but he is nowhere in sight. For a moment I am scared; what if he is back underwater?

Something in the back of my head tells me he isn't and I calm down. I look around and I am still back at the beginning. Alone and scared. Because Louis left. What the hell kind of dream is this? I want out I don't like this. WAKE UP

WAKE UP YOU IDIOT

WAKE THE FUCK UP

WAK-

I am finally pulled out of my dream as I sit up on my bed, panting and sweating as I shake the dream off. I hate dreams like that with a burning passion. Ironic dreams I call them; a mix of my fears and some dumb life lesson or basically a metaphor. The drowning now a fear and being pulled down, then when Louis kisses me I get back up. He saves me but then disappears and I am back to the beginning all alone with no one to help me. These dreams always leave me angry so I get up and decide to take a shower. I have no idea what time it is but I don't care I have my own bathroom anyways. I stand under the hot water and let it wash away all my thoughts leaving my mind blank. Sometimes it is much better than my own thoughts. I get out of the shower and change into some jeans short, a light jumper and put a beanie on my hair as I head down to the beach once more. The sun is getting up so it's still quite early.

As I watch the sunrise I think back to that nightmare to try and figure out what it means. Am I afraid of water now? To be honest the thought of going swimming doesn't sound very appealing anymore. But what about Louis? I know I love him and he truly did save me but he left again. When he left I felt empty and back right to where I began. Does it mean I will go back my depression without him? I admit I failed myself again and I got too bloody weak these past couple weeks but I try and resist it. I have somewhat resisted it. But how long will that last? I shake my head and decide to take care of one problem at a time.

I get up from where I was sitting in the sand and head closer to the water. I stop right at the edge before the wave can hit my feet and I freeze. I try and push myself on going further but I can't seem to move anymore. It's as if I was glued to this spot watching the waves and praying the water doesn't hit my feet. This can't be happening I love swimming. I don't understand but looking at the water I am having trouble breathing. I try and relax but nothing seems to work and tears start to blur my vision as I struggle to calm my whole body.

"Harry?" A familiar voice calls my name but I still cannot move from my spot. I don't even turn around to acknowledge him as I stand still frozen.

"Harry are you alright?" Louis comes closer to me and puts a hand on my shoulder.

"Oh my God, Harry you're shaking what's wrong?" I am? I don't even realize it but finally I turn my head to look at Louis and he must notice something is wrong because he frowns a bit.

"L-Louis?" I stutter out and he nods

"Tell me Harry what's wrong." He insists and I shake my head trying to get my thoughts together before speaking.

"I-I c-can't... the water... I-I'm s-scared" I try and say but mostly comes out as all my thoughts at once and a stutter but Louis seems to catch on as his face lights up and he pulls me into a hug.

"Shhh Haz its okay it's normal after what you've been through alright? It'll take maybe a little bit but you'll conquer your fear of water I promise. You're strong I know you are alright?" He reassures me and I only nod, still holding him tightly.

"Common let's bring you back upstairs." I feel drained of energy and I still feel frozen on the spot so I don't move, I can't. Louis let's go of me understanding my lack of movement and looks at me questioningly almost hesitant. I nod as I understand what he is silently asking me and he picks me up bridal style and he walks back to the house, me in his arms bringing me back to me room. He gently puts me down on the bed, kisses my forehead and he's about to leave when I grab his wrist. He turns around a bit shocked but I don't let go.

"Don't go." I whisper barely audible but he hears it as he nods. He takes his shoes off and comes down to lie with me on the bed as I cuddle into him, inhaling his beautiful smell. His arms come around me, bringing me closer.

"Alright I'll stay. I promise." He whispers in my ear but I don't answer back and I close my eyes. I fall asleep to him humming a familiar tune and finally I feel my body relax.