The Heartbreaker (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 30

“Alright Harry, we need to talk.” I cringe at the hard tone he is using. I’m not ready for this talk. I look down and I hear him sigh.

“No we don’t need to talk about that.” I reply back, my voice already shaking.

“Harry we are leaving in a couple of days. We need to figure this out.”

“No Louis we really don’t.” I snap back

“Harry we are not leaving this place until you and I have talked.”  I sigh. Can I really have this conversation with Louis? I just don’t know if I am ready yet. He’ll be disappointed in me. I never even told him what happened when I was 14. Should I? He might hate me if he figures it out another way but I know he’ll never look at me the same way. Is it worth it? I am so deep in my thoughts I don’t notice Louis leaving his spot on the stairs and coming to sit beside me until I feel him cup my face with his hands. His blue eyes don’t leave mine and I am practically hypnotized by them.

“Talk to me Hazza baby, tell me what’s wrong.” He pleads me, his blue eyes searching mine for an answer.

“I-I don’t know where to start” I answer instead, trying to assemble my thoughts.

“How about we start with what happened in the water...” He trails off looking at me expectantly and I freeze looking up at him. He knows? I am not sure how to answer him and he seems to hesitate on his next question.

“Harry, you didn’t hit your head did you?” I don’t answer; I just shake my head instead and look down. He doesn’t seem too surprised by my answer but more like confirming his own thoughts. I notice although sadness passes through his eyes when I shake my head and I immediately feel guilty. He clears his throat before speaking again.

“So tell me what really did happen under that water then.” I hesitate once more but there is no point in lying anymore.

“I gave up.” I simply answer and he raises his eyebrows.

“What do you mean gave up?” I shrug

“At first I was fighting to get back up, I was struggling to breathe but then for just a single second I thought “What’s the point?” and so I didn’t want to fight anymore, I didn’t think there was anything worth going back up there for. So I let myself sink.” I look back to see his reaction and there is anger as well as pain. He looks down and I see him fighting back tears.

“Nothing worth going back? What about me Harry? What about the other boys and your mum and Gemma. What about the fans? Do you really think the band could continue without you? And me in all of this what would I do without you?” His voice cracks on the last sentence.

“Move on, forget about me and finally live happy.” I answer back

“I would never be happy without you Harry. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me what has gotten into you?! You weren't always like this what happened to the happy Harry I knew, the one from X-Factor who would always laugh at whatever stupid joke I said and would always get naked. Tell me Harry because I don’t know where he went. I just want to help you be happy.” Louis cried to me and now I am also fighting back tears. Should I tell him?

“Lou... there’s something you should know about me. Something I’ve never told anybody. Only my family knows and it’s not something I am really proud of.” He looks back at me waiting for me to continue. I look down at my hands on my laps and he takes mine. His hand fits so perfectly with mine as he tries to reassure me; sensing my nervousness.

“You know you can tell me anything.” I look back up at his bright blue eyes filled with concern and I swallow as I am about to reveal my darkest secret. I look away again and the words flow out of my mouth.