The Bad Boy Returns

Chapter 38: He's A Good Guy

KAT'S POV
When you have to live with a dreadful part of your life alone it eats away at you slowly. Pulling at you until you become a shell of who you were. Who you wish you could be. It gnaws at your thoughts mercilessly waiting for you to break. For you to crack under the pressure.
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I'm used to lying, I mean almost everyone I know has done it to me continuously. It's just something I've dealt with for as long as I can remember. My parents, especially my mom. I got it from them constantly and it took me a while before I even realized it.
It was so comforting to finally find someone who is brutally honest like Shane. He was always straight with me, even if it hurt my feelings. I thought at least I could count on that. I guess not.

"Kat! What are you doing here?" I lift my head up wearily staring forward to see Jennifer standing in front of me bubbly as ever. I was currently hiding in a small craft store trying to busy myself from my thoughts. I didn't really know what I was doing but I had to be somewhere where no one I know could find me. Obviously that didn't work out too well. "I was thinking about taking up a hobby." I say dryly picking up a ball of burgundy yarn, rolling in between my small fingers. "How have you been doing? I heard about the crash, I'm sorry." She gives me a warm smile, placing her hand on my shoulder. Her comforting demeanor makes me want to hug her and cry my eyes out at the same time. I back up slightly, watching her arm fall to her side. "I'm-I'm okay. It's whatever." I try to brush it off hoping she'll drop the subject. She gives me an obstinate look, not trusting my words. "Well if you need someone to talk to you know I'm here." She offers giving me a tender smile. "No matter what." She adds, using her psychiatrist voice. "I know, thank you." I return her smile reluctantly.
She grabs her stuff and begins to leave before turning back around tautly. "I know it's none of my business but did something happen between you and Shane?" She asks, lightly wincing. I groan internally looking back at her. "We had a fight. A big one." I say vaguely, which is enough for her. "Well I hope you two can patch things up." She's says optimistically. I shake my head lightly. "I'm not sure we can this time." I say quietly.
"I know he makes a lot of mistakes and it can be tiring to deal with but he's a good guy. He just wants to protect you. He always has." She says before leaving the store without another word. I stand there in the yarn aisle contemplating her words, letting them rattle around in my brain.
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Slumping against my locker the next day I people watch, looking at all the different people storming through the school hallway. Most of them are unaware of their limited time to converse while others are sprinting to class way to early. To my dismay Shane enters the hallway slowly. His head covered by a hoodie I barley notice the bags underneath his once enamoring eyes that now look dull and tired. He seems to have permanent scowl etched on his face. He stuffs his fists in his pockets. He lifts his head momentarily making eye contact with me. Anguish flashes in his eyes briefly before he looks back down passing by more quickly. I force myself to rip my eyes away from him.
"Kat?" I turn away from my locker quickly to find Brit cautiously approaching me. "I don't want to talk to you. Or anyone for that matter." I snap, shutting my locker tightly. I turn on my heels and stalk away. She follows behind me quickly. "You knew. You knew something about me that has haunted me for the last three years and you continually harassed me knowing what happened." I turn around face to face with her. "For the last time I didn't know! I admit to paying him to go out with you and then dump you but I NEVER in a million years told him to do that." She explains once again. I sigh, struggling to stay composed. "If I had known, you bet I would have thrown his ass in prison myself!" She proclaims, puffing out her chest. She breaks me down and I nod. "Okay, fine but I can't just forget everything that has happened." I say before exiting the front gates of the school leaving her stranded in the hallway. I throw my hair up into a loose ponytail feeling flustered. I force my eyes shut and take deep breaths to calm my rattled nerves. Ever since I found out that they knew I've been on edge. Were they the only ones that knew? I just wish that no one knew. That it never even happened.

I feel my eyes burning with tears threatening to spill. I squeeze my eyes tightly in an attempt to stop them from leaking. I strip off my black sweater tying it around my waist securely. Turning I see students scrambling to leave the school as quickly as possible. Noticing a plethora of teenagers I quickly head the opposite direction and try to make my way home. Pulling my phone out of my pocket I notice at least thirty missed calls and texts from the likes of Shane and Brit. As I continue scrolling I notice one missed call from Nikki, from only minutes ago. I redial her number in hopes to talk to her. She answers on the second ring and I clutch the phone in glee.

'Hey Kat! What's up?' She says brightly, I can almost see the smile on her face
"Hi. Everything's fine. How about you?" I say trying to sound cheerful.
'Stop right there. I can tell something is wrong. What happened?' Her voice bellows in my ear. Knowing I have no choice I delve into the entire story about Shane and Brit and how we are fighting. I skillfully leave out the reason we were fighting.
"So now we are fighting I guess or not. We haven't talked in a week..." I trail off not knowing exactly how we stand at this point.
'I know you don't want to hear this but from what you told me it sounds like he made a mistake. You shouldn't be too hard on him. I know you've had your fair share of assholes but he's not. I know we both like to joke about him being a douche but you and I both know that is not true. It seems like he was just being considerate of how you would feel. He's always watched out for you. He's a good guy.' She says sincerely telling me what deep down I already know. 'But I don't know the whole story so I can't make that choice, that's up to you.' She advises me, once again fixing my problems. "Thanks for listening Nikki, I miss you." I tell her. There's a pause before she replies. 'I miss you too. Kat...?'
She trails off quietly. 'Nothing I'll tell you later, good luck.' She says before hanging up the phone abruptly. I place my phone back in my pocket confused.
I make my way by the empty grass field when I see a figure moving from the other side of it. They move back and forth rolling on a skateboard, occasionally doing tricks. They suddenly stop and turn around looking my way.
The figure slowly makes its way over to me and I see that it's Shane holding his skateboard in his left hand. "Kat!" He rushes over to me, brushing his hand over my forearm. I turn quickly trying to walk away from him. He stands his ground in front of me not letting me pass. "I don't want to talk to you right now." I mumble, feeling a strange wave of embarrassment flood my body. "Too bad." He states standing like a brick wall in front of me, dropping his skateboard to the ground.
I push his chest trying to make him move out of the way. "Move!" I tell him, not meeting his eyes. He snatches my wrists forcing me to look at him. "I need to talk to you." He says firmly but softy, looking at me with his enticing blue eyes that pull me towards him. I try to rip my arms from his grip but it's no use. I slump in defeat as he loosens his grip, but continues holding my hands in his.
"I need to explain to you-" he starts before I cut him off, with a realization of my own.
"Was I some kind of charity case to you? Did you feel guilty and that's why you decided to start talking to me? Or was it some sick joy in hanging out with the girl that was raped!" I pause staring at him with burrowed eyes. He tries to speak but I continue. "Because I've been trying to find some sort of explainable reason why you started acting differently when you came back. I just didn't know that it would be out of pity. I thought that was below you."
I say, glaring at his silent figure.
"No! It was nothing like that. I would NEVER. I wasn't hanging around you because I felt guilty. How could you think that?" He tries defending himself, sounding deflated. He lets go of my hands but takes an extra step towards me, forcing me to look up to look at him.
"I don't know what to think. You knew for how long and then you come back being nice to me? What am I supposed to think?" I say to him.
"Maybe that I wanted to hang out with you? Not out of pity but because I genuinely have the want to?" Hurt crosses his features, and I hear Jennifer and Nikki in the back of my mind.
He's a good guy.
Maybe I was too quick to jump on him for lying to me? I mean he never got to explain why he did it. I mean he makes mistakes and I can't punish him for being human.

"Maybe it's the fact that I've been in love with you since as long as I can remember."
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The story is unfolding! But there's a lot more to come :))
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