The Bad Boy Returns

Chapter 56: A Matter Of Time

I have to admit that having my mother back in my life has actually been going pretty well. I have begun to realize how much I've missed having that nurturing motherly presence in my life. It's somewhat comforting. Over the past month or so we've been bonding more and having real in depth conversations. She's becoming more and more like the woman I remember growing up with.

"You should do it, face your fear." My mother sits across the egg white table in her mostly blank room. Tucking her now washed short hair behind her ear as she nods.
"Really? You're the first person who's agreed with me." I bite my bottom lip, surprised with the answer she gave me. She sighed, tilting her head to the left, her eyes glued to my face. Her lips twitch into a sad smile that I'm all too familiar with these days.
"It's not like I'm overjoyed at what happened to you okay. In fact I'm the opposite but if I've learned anything in this place it's that you've got to face your problems head on. It's the only way to feel better, even if it doesn't last forever."
Mouth wide open I stare straight at her incredulously, not believing those words came from her lips. However what she said rang some truth making me really think.
For the rest of the visit all I could think about was what she said, as she went on to many other topics.
From an outside perspective it sounds like a terrible idea, like it was number one on a list of what not to do in a situation like this. But in my head it feels like the only concrete solution.

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I peel my eyes open as the warm, sparkling warmth hits my skin through the window. Blinking several times, my phone begins to buzz from beside my pillow. Rolling my body to the side I glance at the screen to see Shane's mom calling me, picking up immediately after.

"Hello." Running my hand down my face I wait for a reply.
'Hey sweetheart, sorry if I woke you I just need to talk to you about some of the wedding plans.' Her soft voice flows into my ears.
"It's fine, I was going to wake up anyway." A low groan exits my mouth as I pull myself out of bed.
"What did you need to talk about?" I attempt to hurry up the conversation, not in the mood to speak to anyone, especially this early in the morning.

'Yes well first I wanted to make sure that you got the whole dress situation figured out.' Her voice trails of as if she were moving quickly.
A few weeks back I noticed a large tear in the back of the dress right through the zipper. Now I have no idea how it got there, but let's just say I had a minor freak out when I saw it.
"Don't worry I got it fixed and ready to go." I assure her, searching around my room for a pair of pants. "Is that all?" I inquired, focusing on sliding a pair of wholly jeans on.
'Yeah, could you also please recall the florist, there was a mix up, it would help me a ton.' Her breath drags turning into a large sigh. Her stress is radiating through the phone.
"How's Chase? Are you two happy?" I decide on changing the subject moving to a less stressful topic.
She gives another sigh except this one is filled with relief. 'Yeah, it's so crazy I mean even now we are still learning new things about each other.' The happiness in her voice puts a grin on my face. This women deserves the best in life and I'm glad she is finally getting it.
"It's really cool that you guys get to fall in love all over again." Heading over to my mirror I take a look at my untouched hair, grimacing at it.
'Hey speaking of...I feel like I ask you this every time I talk to you, but are you and Shane okay?' I shake my head knowing this would come up sooner or later.
"I'm assuming he told you about my idea." I scrunch my eyes shut.

'Yeah, kind of."

I sigh, preparing myself for yet another lecture about how this is a horrible idea and I shouldn't do it.

'Look, I don't have to tell you that Shane's trying to protect you because we all know that by now.' She pauses before continuing her thoughts.
'It's not my place to tell you what to do, it's not Shane's place either. It's nobody's except for yours. Whatever you decide just be careful.'

I was taken aback by her words, as always everyone had an opinion about what I should do but she didn't give me hers. She's just being supportive, which is all I've been asking for.
"Thank you Jennifer you have no idea how much I needed to hear that." I

'May I ask when you are planning on going?' She adds.
"Tonight actually." I tell her, my nerves buzzing.
'Well I hope you get the results you're looking for sweetheart, I'll talk to you later.'
'Thank you, bye." With that I hang up the phone feeling slightly better about what I'm doing. Now all I have to do is get ready.

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Checking the red glowing clock beside me I decide that it's time to head out. My breath comes out shaky as I grab my things and head downstairs. I can do this.

As I'm about to head out the door the door bell chimes. Swinging the door open I am face to face with the one person I didn't expect to see tonight.
"Shane?" I step back slightly and he takes a cautious step towards me, a reserved look shown on his face. "If you're here to try and change my mind, then you wasted a trip. I've decided and that's that." I begin reminding him. At my comment he shakes his head slightly, gently grabbing my wrists with both hands. My lecture is cut short as I realize that he is touching me. I stop mid-sentence staring up into his stormy eyes which I find are gazing into mine.
"I'm not here to stop you this time." His voice is surprisingly softer compared to the last time we spoke.
"Then what are you doing here?" I question.
At that he slides his hands down until they are interlocked with my small ones. He tugs me closer until our faces are only a couple inches away from each other.
"I'm here to apologize," His voice even lower, if that were possible. " I don't understand it, at all and I still wish you would reconsider this but you were right I need to support your decisions. I'm here for you and I'm sorry." He concludes his speech giving me an anxious look.
I give him a relieved smile, happy that he came to support me despite what he may think.
"Thank you Shane. That's all I wanted." With that he pulls me into a hug, cradling the back of my head. We separate and I give him a small kiss, pushing our lips together for a couple seconds before separating again. "I have to go." I say in a low voice. He nods stepping to the side. "Do you want me to stay here until you get back?" He asks me, hope in his eyes.
"I would like that." I nod, opening the door.
"Hey don't worry to much while I'm gone." I make a subtle attempt at a joke to lighten the mood.
"No promises." He throw back at me, a forced smile on his face.
Making my way out I don't miss the nervousness on his face as I shut the door behind me. It's now or never.

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Standing in front of the entrance I pull out my phone to check the time. It's been twenty minutes since I arrived here and I can barely move. The door handle is right there but it feels so far away. Like I can't reach it. Only after a nice man opens the door on his way out am I forced to make my way inside seeing as he is holding the door open for me.
"Thanks." I say in a small voice as I continue to the little desk where a stout little women sits typing away on her computer. As I approach she lifts her head up revealing her aged whiskey colored eyes. She gives me a small smile waiting for me to speak.

"I'm here to um visit someone." I explain not sure how this whole thing works.
"Oh okay just sign in here with your name and who you're visiting and you can take a seat in the visitation room." She tells me quickly returning back to her computer screen.
I nod, doing as she said before making my way to the visitation area. I take a seat at one of the blue tables noticing other inmates speaking to their wives or brothers. They all look so serious. Concentrating.
Then I notice one of the officers standing guard at the gate. Officer Jane, she was the same officer who ended up arresting Nate. We talked a few times afterwards when she told me if I needed anything I could ask her.
Her eyes latch on mine as she notices me as well.
"Are you here for the reason I think you're here?" She inquires, giving me a sad face. I try ignore the face as I reply to her question. "Yeah I am." I answer at the same time another officer is bringing Nate to the gate. Officer Jane notices as well and goes over to the gate. "I'm going to ask that we put restraints on him before you let him over there." Her demanding voice full of authority. The other officer looks over her shoulder to me then back at her nodding in understanding. With that they cuff him, before bringing him over where he calmly takes the seat across from me. My body stiffens the minute he lays his grimy eyes on me.
Thankfully Officer Jane makes a decision to stand close by, keeping an eye on our conversation. I don't think I've ever been so grateful.
Nate leans forward, a slimy smile making its way to his lips. I lean back slightly trying to stand my ground.
With a sneer he finally spoke. "It was only a matter of time before you came crawling back."

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