Lovestruck (EDITING)

58: Lost in Translation

Next on my list: 5. Ask to work alone in Drama.

Turns out, Landon chose the best possible day to skip class. There's no sign of him when I walk into the drama room and take my seat in the circle, successfully avoiding Dani's attention. I keep my head down and barely participate in our surprisingly quick game of 21 before we're dismissed to work on our group assignments and I have my chance.

"Ms Leroy?" My voice squeaks shyly as I approach my teacher with caution.

She's always intimidated me. Then again, so would anyone with a personality as loud as hers.

"Yes, dear?" She responds, glancing up at me from behind her glasses.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm going to be continuing my assignment on my own from now on." I smile sweetly at her to encourage the most positive response possible.

"Is that right?" Ms Leroy puts down her pen and her eyes focus on mine. "Are you having... problems... with your partner, Miss Miller?"

"Oh, no. He's just fine. I just feel that I would work much better on my own." I try to avoid the nasty specifics of the situation.

"Sure, sure..." She mumbles the words as her gaze returns to the papers in front of her and I begin to walk away. "You see, Skyelin... This is a group assignment. I'm sure there are other students who work better as individuals, but no one else has come to me with this problem. I'd like you to continue to work in your pairing, thank you Miss Miller."

And with that, I know she's finished speaking to me. Maybe I should have gotten into the nasty specifics, after all.

***

I thank the bus driver as I get off the bus and cross the road to my house. The sky is pink and the clouds are like glowing puffs of marshmallow above me. It must be around 6 o'clock, but after spending all of detention alone scraping gum off of desks, I feel as though it should be way after dark.

I know I should feel relieved to be home from my dreaded school day, but I find it hard to relax knowing that tomorrow could be an even bigger nightmare than today was. I begin to fantasize about falling into bed tomorrow night as I unlock the front door and climb the stairs up to my bedroom. Thank god it's friday tomorrow. Even after a single day of school I'm craving the weekend. I toss my bag onto my bed and let myself fall beside it with a loud sigh.

I'm beginning to miss the days when I was unnoticed by the people around me. When I was just another face in the crowd. When conversations were light and life was passive. When did it become so difficult for me to face the people around me? When did everything get so heavy? Rather, when did I become so weak?

After attempting to bury myself in homework for a while, I decide I'm not interested in what the rest of today might bring, so I curl up under the covers of my bed and shut my eyes. I'm asleep before the sun is. And for that I am weak.

***

My alarm wakes me on friday morning and I groan as I slowly drag myself from the warmth of my bed sheets. I actually feel a spark of something within me as I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror. It's hope. And it's all I need to get myself going.