A Bleak Kind Of Happy.

12: Try To Get Me.

Farkle drove us far away from anywhere. It was a dark chilly night and I wasn't sure where we were going. I didn't ask. I just enjoyed this new emotions I was feeling inside. It was a mixture of wonder,amazement and a little fear of where the night would take us.

I wanted this and didn't want this at the same time. I was seriously sick.  Farkle could be taking me back home for all I knew and here I was thinking we're...

What are we? What are we doing? Where are we going?

Reality slaps me hard on the face and I gather whatever courage I would need and question Farkle.

"Farkle, where are we going?"

No response.

"Farkle?"

Nothing.

"Farkle, tell me where we're going or I'm going to get down right now." I say firmly. At least I think I am.  It was getting scary. Farkle still hasn't said anything. He's not even looking at me.

I look out the window and it's like we're going through this never ending tunnel. Everything is dark. His headlights aren't even on. No houses. No trees. Nothing.

"Please Farkle, tell me where we're going." I plead, my voice sounding cracked."And why are your headlights off?"

He says nothing but I hear him chuckle quietly and shaking his head gently.

Farkle Minkus.  I first met him in kindergarten. What was my perception about him? Hmm, how about weird, annoying and freakishly smart.  Those seemed to be very true. I don't know how, but he along with Lucas and Riley became my closest friends. Which was weird because you wouldn't suspect a girl who was constantly troubled with being sad and pretending to be happy(me) becoming friends with happy-for-no-reason and loved by everyone Riley, too-hot-to-be-human Lucas and very strange and probably hated by his parents for giving him that name-which I guess isn't true cause he gets everything he wants -and your typical cliché nerd in lame high school flicks Farkle. But your typical cliché nerd changes, right? They get new hairstyles and clothes, become the cool kids and stuff. Exactly like the new Farkle. I never wanted to be associated with the popular people in school but somehow, suddenly the closest people I can call friends are the lovable, the hottie and the rich kid nerd. That didn't mean it increases my chances of people noticing me in school and I guess that's how I intend it to be.

I don't say anything for a really long time so does Farkle.  I was afraid but I wanted this, so whatever's going on I have to know I'm here with a harmless rich nerd.

My mind was completely blank till the car came to an abrupt stop. I look at Farkle and he looks back. He's smiling. A very stupid smile judging by where we are. He should be screaming, afraid, terrified besides he's a harmless rich nerd isn't he?

I look out my window and I try to adjust my eyes to the darkness. I'm suddenly missing my bed and wanting to be at home. I glare at Farkle.

"Are you afraid?" He asks plainly.

"Where are we Farkle?" I ask in my 'no nonsense' tone. I usually use this tone when he's trying to flirt with me.

He's chuckling.

He's chuckling?

How dare he chuckle? I'm serious. I grab my phone from my pocket at look at the screen. It's 10:49 pm and I'm here with him in the middle of nowhere -I guess cause it looks like it and he's chuckling.

Not even looking at him, I unbuckle my seatbelt and open the door and get out.

The cold air hits me like a block. I don't even take a second to peak at my surroundings and I begin to take off.

I'm cursing Farkle in my head then I feel a warm hand on my shoulder making me stop. I know it's Farkle but I don't turn around to check.

"I ask you for a ride home after I see my mom off at the airport and you bring me here?" I question quite annoyed.

"Is someone angry."

I was... I don't know what I was but I nod forcefully probably making me look like a petulant child.

"Well then, tell me how you feel Maya, I want to get you."

I didn't say anything.  What more does he want to know? I already affirmed the fact that I was angry, what else?

"Uptight about everything." Farkle muttered. "Maybe that's why I don't get you. It's cause you won't let me. Why don't you just let loose? even for just one night. We won't talk about it again."

I glare at him but I'm not able to hold it for long. A soft sigh escaped my lips. What if the remedy for my hopeless-sadness -that's  what I'll call it- is being free. Letting loose. It couldn't be so hard, could it?

Desperation again. I'm getting sick of this. I've always had a fear of dying alone. What if the only three people I've been able to call friends get sick of me, realization that I'm a weirdo they shouldn't hang out with crosses their minds? Then I'd have no one. Even my mother, who has just given me her phone number after sixteen years of calling her mom, gives up on me. Then I'll be alone. Forsaken and given up on my current façade of playing happy for the purpose of keeping Riley happy.

What's the true meaning of friendship? Maybe Farkle being here after picking me up from the airport was a sign that he cares. That he's a true friend. That he wants to know and as a true friend will listen, will care, will want to get you.

Farkle seems like he's not going to give up trying to get me.

"Well okay, First I'm not uptight, I'm just a bit insecure-" I'm cut off by Farkle.

"Then let me get comfortable." He says sitting down on the ground of sand and remains of dead grass.

I have no choice so I sit crossed-legged on the ground before him.

"Hmm, insecure you say."  Farkle says genuinely interested.

"Yeah, lot of weird stuff with me. Still wanna know more?"

"Yeah... I might relate."

I'm taken aback completely when he says this. Farkle relate?  But I don't show my astonishment.

"Farkle before I go on, let's do this as friends, I'll tell you my insecurities and you'll tell me yours." I wanted to know what bothers Farkle. Like a friend would.

"Don't worry, I got you."

No...you don't.