All I could think was , why . I know I messed up but I didn't think he would take it this far . My eyes welded up as I looked at all the self inflicted wounds that were scattered across his arm . Some long . Some short . Some deep some light .
"Z-Zayn , why ? I chocked out . He looked down guiltily .
"I'm sorry ." He whispered .
Really .
"You're sorry . It's ALL MY FAULT . Why ? Zayn please don't do this to yourself . Don't hurt yourself . I'm so stupid , UGH . I can't live with myself knowing that I'm the reason you were in this unbearable pain . I'm so sorry . I love you so much I- . " I gasped at my unintentional confession .
He looked at me with wide eyes .
"You w-what ?" He said slowly .
"You know as a mate or whatever ." I said trying my best to correct the slip up I'd just made .
If i weren't mistaken he looked a little disappointed . His little lips made a small o formation . He cleared his throat awkwardly .
I needed him to forgive me though .
"Please ." I continued . He sniffled a bit . I looked over his arms it looked quite scary and shocking . He ruined his flawless skin because of me .
He looked up at me . The little sparkle in his eyes had returned . He held his arms out and jerked them back while nibbling on his lips . I caught on soon. I opened up my arms . He slowly hugged me . He let out a shaky breath
.
"Don't let me go ." He whispered against my chest . In not sure was this a friendly or romantic gesture . Whatever it is . It felt so right .
I can tell . I'm starting to develop feelings for him . It's so hard because I love his mother . This is just to hard . Things like this don't happen in real life
*
Niall is having some friends over . He said I could invite Louis and Harry if I wanted . I remember Harry calling me earlier . We discussed everything so I guess you could say I'm not upset with him anymore .
It's around 11pm . There's Ed , Josh , Andy , Harry , Louis , Niall and I . They all brought some type of drug . Reather it being alcohol or weed .
We sat around and joked and told stories for awhile .
"Anyone up for a game of dare or dare ? Josh shouted .
Everyone nodded and cheered in response . We got in a circle and Harry poured drinks into our cups . I have never drank alcohol before so this might be interesting .
"So who's starting us off ." Niall said rubbing his hands together ."
He looked directly at me . Great .
"So Zayn . I dare you to ask 3 people a question ." That's quiet simple .
"Okay um , what's your favourite colour ." I asked awkwardly .
All of the boys excluding Louis and Niall either scoffed or rolled their eyes.
"This is not kindergarten or primary school . This is a grown mans game . Give if another try babe " said Andy
Talk about too much .
"Um , Lou have you ever .. had sex with anyone in here ." I said shamefully .
His eyes widened and the colour off his lightly tanned checks turned to cherry red .
"I , uh yes . " he said . Harry smiled proudly. The boys that didn't know Lou , looked quiet surprised .
"Really , you seemed so damn innocent ." Said Ed . Andy and Josh nodded in agreement .
What's up with the word innocent nowadays .
"Well , I'm NOT ." Louis said sassily as he threw off his glasses , ruffled he hair and downed his drink .
"Ahh ! You're turning me on ." Harry moaned .
Niall laughed loudly along with the others .
"Ok um Andy . What's the weirdest thing you've done ? " I asked becoming more comfortable .
"Well , I once wrote a girls name on my bum , In permanent marker I walked around with tight swimmers bottoms exposing it ."
Everyone looked at him like he was insane . Which.. he was .
"Hey ! In my defence she was pretty fit" He defended .
"Riiight ." I joked . "Ok . Harry , the most daring thing you've done."
"Well ,once I snuck in bed with a mates mum ." He said plainly . Louis rolled his eyes at this . He says it all the time . Now he thinks he's a 'rebel'
"Ok dare someone ." Said Harry . I shook my head so he went instead .
Harry downed his 2nd drink . I could tell the alcohol was getting to him .
"Let's see ." Harry slurred
"Niall , I dare you to blow Zayn ..Right here .
****-
Wasn't as go as I intended . Vote for updates .
