Intoxicated

Chapter 32

Carter POV

"It's been way too long Carter" Lana said hugging me again as I fought not to seem so stiff but, she was so close. I haven't seen her in months and I know this was so sudden with the marriage but, seeing her here on such short notice warmed my heart. But pained me as well.

She smelt so good and I could feel the urge rising.

"Though, I was definitely in shock when I got the invitation to your wedding" she said pulling away smiling and I returned it happily. It was great to see her but, fuck this was hard.

I held my breath till she let go just shrugging. The topic of today pretty much, me disappearing then just getting married. Pretty sure, it surprised everyone. Hell, it surprised me how quick all of this happen. All in a matter of months.

"I'm happy for you though. You look beyond happy" "I am. I can't even explain it. I just love being with him. I love having this with him" I whispered knowing somewhere he was hearing this and I hope it made him smile.

I swallowed hard looking around for second as I smelled her again.

To top it off her heartbeat was in my ears. I tried tuning it out and listening to her speak but, I quickly zoned out looking at her neck again. I could practically see the blood going through her veins.

I swallowed hard looking up to her eyes but, my eyes kept switching back and forth.

My throat was burning and aching for just a taste of her. For a way right now to get her. Cam made sure I was fine before the wedding but, now I needed some. I was going to go crazy if I didn't have any soon.

I could bring her inside and just have a little and compel her to forget.

No. I couldn't.

I took a deep breath shaking my head quickly.

This was a good friend. Known her for a few years, I had to try and fight it. She's a great person and doesn't deserve this. No one here does. You can do this. You can fight it just breathe and relax.

"Carter? Carter?" I focused on her instantly. She looked at me worried. I shook my head thinking of something quickly "Sorry I was looking at your necklace. It's pretty" I said pointing to it putting on a fake smile.

"Aww, thanks it's from Mike. He even engraved I love you on it see?" She said coming closer. I froze up instantly. I was being tortured right now. I held my breath and leaned forward a bit then froze pulling away quickly.

"You okay?" she asked and I nodded instantly. Be cool. Just relax.

"I'm- yeah.. I'm fine I - I'll be back" I said quickly turning and rushing into the house panicking. I know I was probably being looked at like I was crazy but, trust me it was for everybody's sake.

Why was it so hard to do this? Why was it like a punishment?

I couldn't be out there right now. I could have put everybody in danger and I almost hurt my friend. I was so close, so fucking close to getting her.

We should have waited.

I couldn't go back out there.

Imagine all their faces when I would be covered in blood like a crazy lunatic. I was stupid for even believing this would work.

I tensed as I heard his quick feet coming towards me. I kept trying to relax but the vision of hurting someone was overwhelming. My feelings were scattered.

I needed everyone to leave.

We've said our vows, the celebration was over.

I heard the door open and lock instantly while I turned seeing him. He instantly was in front of me holding my face and gently rubbing my cheek.

He took a deep breath leaning his head on mine "Breath Carter... You did it" he whispered but, I shook my head. I didn't do anything but put someone's life in danger.

"I didn't stop you baby. You did it" I looked away still shaking my head. "It's okay to be tempted. It's in your nature to want blood. What makes you strong is when you fight that urge. You've done it" he reassured but the images kept hitting me over and over.

He lifted my head up and waited till "In two days, you resisted the urge. There are dozens of people out there and you haven't slipped" He pulled me and hugging me tight kissing my head gently.

I took a deep breath unsure of what to say. Was I overreacting? Just looking up into his green eyes proved that maybe I was. He was here smiling down at me proud while I was here breaking down.

Why was I putting myself down like this when I had this man trying to bring me up ?

"You don't know how proud I am of you. You don't understand how happy I am to call you mine" he whispered as I leaned against his body taking a deep breath taking his scent it. It was so calming. More than I expected.

He pulled away smiling down at me "Come on, let's go enjoy the rest of our wedding day" he said grabbing my hand but, I tensed up refusing to move. I was calm but, that didn't me so eager to go outside right now. That was the moment I realized my throat was burning.

He turned back to me confused "What's wrong?" I looked down at my feet "Um... I'm hungry. Feels like my throat is on fire" I whispered and he chuckled pulling his sleeve up, holding his wrist to me. I looked at him confused.

You could do that? Drink from another vampire? I guess so?

"Drink" I looked at his wrists hesitant then back at him and he nodded moving closer holding it to my lips. Now I knew how he felt when I offered myself to him. Kind of felt wrong to do. Felt like I was using him.

"Think about that time you were there for me. We'll call it even" he whispered and I sighed opening my mouth I bit into his wrist quickly in hunger closing my eyes.

I held to his arm moaning out as the taste him my tongue. The burning was instantly gone in seconds. Compared to other blood, his is perfect. I pulled away taking a breath feeling so much better that before. Maybe I didn't need any other blood.

I wasn't sure but, maybe it will help. Maybe I was overreacting and just needed to calm down. I was so worried but, I needed to put more faith in myself and more faith in Cameron.