Redemption | A Drake Duology (2016)

1 • Having Options

Roman

I sat with my back flat against the soft cushions and napped fabric tapping my fingers on the side of the lounge couch waiting for Dr. Heisenberg to speak again. My eyes darted from one end of the room to the other and my chest heaved up and down. My mind wandered through every event in my life that she could possibly make me disclose to her but I was drawing blanks.

She tapped her pen on the notepad that she held in her hand. It was gritty and worn, you can tell that she visited it a lot. She had been fairly quiet for the last few minutes while she went over her notes. This wasn't the normal marriage counseling but she made it work as much as she could. She sat up and cleared her throat letting me know that she was ready to begin.

"After looking over your notes and his, I had some questions. The last time you saw you saw your husband was six months ago. Why is that?"

"His career doesn't really allow him a lot of free time."

"Is it that he doesn't have free time or are you avoiding each other? Six months is a long time, even for him,"

"A little bit of both," I admitted. She began to write again but this time her eyes never left the book.

Opening up about a failed marriage was embarrassing. As you talk, you begin to see how simple the solution was to all of your problems. We managed to stay out of the media but I couldn't help but feel like we'd been reduced to the typical celebrity couple—dysfunctional.

Before dating Aubrey, I thought life for celebrity couples was easy and effortless. As a public icon, you have everything you can ask for except privacy, how hard could that be? Very hard.

What you see on TV is a perfect family but they don't talk about the sacrifices being made to withhold that image. There is a huge emotional strain that accompanies the fame and the down side of it is that it effects everyone around you.

My marriage has been a secret for three years. Neither of our families or friends knew; not even our parents and to make matters worse I was only nineteen when we married; he was twenty-six. As one of the most successful music artists in the industry right now, that wasn't a good look for him, especially since his producer is my step brother Noah, or as the OVO family called him, '40'.

I got caught up in the lifestyle by mutual relation. Then, it felt like one of the best decisions I could've made but as time went on, it got stressful. The distance, the rumors, the groupies—it was overwhelming but I thought that I could handle it. I let my emotions get the best of me and I ruined us.

Our relationship was far past complicated. Sometimes I wondered why neither of us have filed for divorce yet. We don't speak, we rarely see each other anymore, we don't live together, we don't have any children and no one knew about us. There were no strings. Divorce was the easiest option.

"Walk me through a normal day when he does return home," said Heisenberg.

"It depends on the mood he's in."

"What's a good day like?" She asked revisiting the second notebook, which I assumed was from his session.

"We'd have sporadic conversation, I'd cook dinner, might pop in a movie or two and end the night with a shared shower."

"That's a step in the right direction. It's great to still be intimate with one another. Did you sleep in the same bed? Cuddle?"