Redemption | A Drake Duology (2016)

F & D • Excerpt

a/n: a short excerpt while i work on this next chapter. i've literally started over 5 times 😔. i'm having a really hard time with this but i'm aiming to have it up no later than thursday.

Roman

        Panicking. I was fucking panicking. At the mere ours of 3am, I found myself dousing my face with water to keep from passing out. I'd gone through a dozen home pregnancy tests hoping for a change in results as if my doctor hadn't confirmed that there was indeed a tiny person cradled in my womb. I was still in a state of shock and my mind had yet to stop running through the terrible lists of risks that followed if I attempted to carry this baby. I didn't know what to do or how to feel. I was thrilled to have actually gotten pregnant after everything that was happening but if it meant putting my life on the line, I wasn't sure if it was something that I wanted to move forward with. I sighed and did the unthinkable—called Noah. He was my outlet in situations like these and although I knew he wouldn't be happy, he could at least give me some type of guidance.

My fingers tapped at the empty pillow beside me as I waited for him to answer. He was grouchy when he did. "I didn't mean to wake you. Sorry," I mumbled.

"It's cool," He said through yawn. "Not sure when I'll get another call like this. What's up?"

Without answering, I broke down. Crying was all I had the stomach for. I was back and forth between throwing up and passing out. My hands shook. I could barely hold the phone to my ear.

"Roman," He called softly. "What's wrong?"

I didn't know how to break the news to Noah, especially since I'd yet to make amends with him. This was our first conversation outside of just greeting one another whenever we were in the same room. I was skeptical about his reaction. He was still warming up to the relationship being real.

"Everything," I sniffled. "Everything is falling apart,"

"You're going to have to be more specific than that if you want me to help,"

I blinked back the rest of my tears and fiddled with my fingers. "How would you feel if I told you that I was having a baby?"

"Are you telling me that you're having baby?"

I hesitated and pulled the phone away from my ear. A deep breath was needed. "I hope I am," I answered quietly. "We're expecting but it's early. Only time will tell how this plays out,"

The line was silent. That only made me feel like I should've kept that bit of information to myself.

"Congratulations," His tone was flat. I sighed.

"I know that I keep disappointing you. I—" He stopped me.

"You could never disappoint me. All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy and it's obvious that's what he makes you. I just wish you would've told me,"

"What was I supposed to say without you nearly killing us both?" I argued. "I was happy then but you wouldn't have cared,"

"I know his secrets. I know his filth. I didn't want you to get caught up in that. You were young, naïve—manipulation was easy and we know that's what he does best,"

The more he talked, the more he pissed me off. Yes, Aubrey is crazy but he's no different than anyone else. He knows how to get what he wants and I've learned to pick up on that.

"You think he manipulated me into a relationship?"

"I'm sure he held money and sex over your head on a few occasions. I honestly don't know a woman who wouldn't take that deal,"