The Internship #Wattys2017

Chapter |26|: Fighting emotions

I think love is interesting. If you're lucky enough to find someone you love then I look up to you. I'm use to being used and hurt. You know I remind myself of Michael Jackson when he was the scarecrow?~ Zachary Bradley

I'm a horrible person. I must be. I look so guilty in front of Maurice and of course I would. Hurting him isn't something I would ever do, or could ever do. Zach is more of the funny and outspoken type and maybe that's why I'm drawn towards him. When I was sad and lonely he came to talk to me, Then again I was sad about Maurice and didn't feel like seeing his face for the time being.

Just listening to myself I sound selfish as hell. Any girl would feel happy and lucky to be with someone like Maurice. But I'm the one who's willing to break a guy's heart for his best friend. I'm the one who also told a guy I love him when I don't know if I even want to feel that emotion.

I grabbed my pillow and put it over my face before screaming into it as my phone rung having the caller ID of Zach flash on the screen. I didn't even wait as I answered right away.

"Hey, What are you doing?"

"Picked up on the second ring? Someone has way too much free time" He laughed and I rolled my eyes.

"My phone was next to me, Besides I could use a good laugh"

"Pleasure I can always do that, But I called because Maurice is really stressing out about you. Usually I wouldn't mind it since Hailey really messed him up, But you two are like perfect together"

He noticed, Of course. He's like, like another me. "No relationship is perfect Zach, Besides I've just been stressed with my mom. I'm great"

"But you two are. Geeks attract each other"

"I am not a geek thank you very much"

"Right, And I'm a total chick magnet. Can you believe I haven't gotten laid in months? Starting to hate my life"

That definitely triggered me. "Not everyone wants a goofy guy. Try being serious for once"

"I would, But then I'd be like you and Maurice sitting in your rooms on a Saturday night thinking about each other. That's not my thing"

I fake laughed. "Can I hang up now?"

"No, This is actually serious. Be honest, Do you love Maurice?"

"Of course"

"I notice a lot, My brain may be small at times but I know love and disgust. And it shouldn't mix."

"Love isn't something for you to worry about. Don't stress yourself worrying about someone who doesn't wanna be worried about" I said a little aggressive. The thought of him knowing about feelings scared me and pissed me off. He isn't supposed to be the observant one.

I heard moving in the background before a sigh. "I'll let that slide since you clearly don't wanna talk on the phone, But I think love is interesting. If you're lucky enough to find someone you love then I look up to you. I'm use to being used and hurt, You know I remind myself of Michael Jackson when he was the scarecrow?"

I looked down feeling worse than I already did. "You'll find someone, I'm gonna go to sleep if that's fine"

It was quiet for a while. "Yeah, Goodnight Faith"

"Good-"

He hung up.

Zach

I rubbed my forehead as I gripped my phone while Maurice went into the store. Closing my eyes and sighing I actually felt myself tear up.

I hate when I do this, When I do something to make everyone hate me. When I'm so desperate for stuff that I choose to take what makes others happiness away because I wanna see what it feels like. When my once goofy and let's be honest unwanted funny exterior is ripped apart and I just want to have fun and finally feel like I did what I wanted to do and live my life to its fullest.

Yeah right, that'll happen just after I completely disrespect my best friend again. He shouldn't have forgiven me after I slept with Hailey but he did and that's because he's a forgiving person. Let it be me to finally break that from him when he finds out I've been having fantasies about Faith.

"Hey, Why you look like you're ready to end it all?" Maurice asked as he got back in the car.

"Yeah I was dying of boredom waiting for you, Really considered killing myself" I lied and he laughed as I started driving again.

"There was a long line, But guess who was in there"

I smiled. "Was it Beyonce?"

"You wish, It was Draya, Remember the really spirited girl you dated. Wow you two were like twins"

I nodded. "Draya, Wow. That woman was great, Did she remember you?"

"Immediately, She asked for your new number. I gave it to her you're welcome"

I groaned. "Are you serious? I don't need that right now"

"You exactly need a girlfriend. This fake happiness act is getting really tired. Be actually happy for once"

"I'm happy around faith" I mumbled and bit my lip regretting I said that.

He laughed. "Who's not?"

I ignored his question and drifted back to what he said. I don't hate Draya, She was actually the best girlfriend I ever had. She was so down to earth and shared my goofy, positive attitude. She smiled 24/7 which kept me smiling and wow her voice would lighten anyone's mood. We broke up after I decided it would be wise to get drunk one night. I ended up telling her I never loved her and I refused to let myself love her.

I woke up sober, crying, and hating myself even more.

"Damn, My phones dead. Can you call faith for me?"

"She's sleep, I already did. Actually she recommended we all go out tomorrow for lunch"

He smiled and I could see the love in his eyes. "So she isn't mad at me, You were right. Sorry I doubted you"

I faked a smile. "Oh come on, Who'd doubt me"

A lying, backstabbing bitch.