Good Riddance || Billie Joe Armstrong

21st Century Breakdown

-Billie-

I let small pieces of dirt fall from my hand and onto the already filled hole in the ground. Today went by in a blur, and I didn't know if I was thankful for that or upset. Reality smacked me in the face when I saw her pale body lying in that casket unmoving.

At this point I couldn't even feel the heartache that's been constantly bothering me for the last couple of days. My heart is probably nonexistent; cut out of my chest and buried six feet deep with her.

"God you're fucking me up all over again Lauren," I chuckled emotionlessly, "Why did you have to go and do this all over again?"

I stayed silent for a second as if expecting her to respond. I'm probably going crazy, and I wouldn't be surprised if my friends and family are starting to think this. "I think the reality of this is finally beginning to set in..."

"Billie!" The sudden voice caused me to jump slightly. I thought everyone had left for the after party by now.

When I turned around, her brother stood before me holding a book in his hand, "Matt? What are you doing here?"

"I had to give you this before you went MIA again," the taller man took my arm and placed a leatherback book in my hand, "It was her journal."

"Why are you giving this to me?" Her family didn't particularly like me, especially Matt, so this was confusing.

His piercing blue eyes shot me a glare before he shook his head and turned away, "You'll understand when you read it," his hand waved a farewell before he disappeared in the distance.

"Your family always confused me, y'know?" I groan and run my hand through my hair, "I'll never understand half of the things they do."

I turned the book over in my hands a couple of time before sitting in one of the chairs that were left out and opening it. Most of the pages were worn and tattered from use over the years, but the back looked to have brand new pages added.

'Dear Billie,

Hey Beej,

Sorry about that we both know I'm not formal enough for that shit. Now if you're reading this that means I'm gone and Matt actually followed through with his promise. I'm going to start by saying I'm sorry I left you. I knew it was getting closer since my eyesight is starting to go.'

There were some scribbled next to those words as if someone tried to grab her pencil away from her, 'Let at you, every time I try to do something productive you try to interrupt me.' That caused a smile to form on my face. This must have been what she was writing when we were on our flight to Britain.

'Anyways, I'm giving you this because there's a bunch of random scribbles and chords I wrote while you were working on the new songs. I wrote down things I believed could work whenever you got stuck on a song, so enjoy. Don't even worry about giving me credit because I wrote them for you specifically, plus I'm not there anymore to sue you.'

Her and her damn sarcasm never ceased to appear in the most unnecessary times. "You never changed, not even on your death bed..."

---

Since that day things have gotten better at home. The kids all went back to school, no matter how badly they wanted to skip and I wanted to let them. Lately Joey has gotten serious about playing drums, so we can never shut him the hell up. He's not horrible, but he's not the best either.

I've spent most of my free time either teaching Jakob and Landon how to play guitar, or writing new material for our next album. However, it's proven to be harder than I thought it would be since we just released an international best-selling album. The next one has to be just as good, if not better, or else we'll end up being post Dookie Green Day again. Not saying our follow up albums weren't good, they just didn't sell like Dookie did.

Today however, I've spent most of my time reading through Laurens journal entries. Most of them were from 93' and 94' when we were together the first time, and it brought me down memory lane.

Mike was sitting in the kitchen talking with Adrienne and his new girlfriend Brittney about god knows what, and I have no idea where Tre is; probably searching for a new girlfriend or something.

"Billie do you want to call up Tre and try to get this album finished?" Mike shouted from his spot at my kitchen bar. I hesitantly pulled my attention away from the leather book to look at my best friend.

"Yeah," I sigh shutting the book and dropping it on the coffee table, "Let's get this finished." I clapped my hands together and took a deep breath before walking into the kitchen and wrapped my arm around Adrienne for the first time in months. "You look beautiful," I whisper and kiss her cheek softly.

I've neglected her when I shouldn't be, but I'm glad she was as considerate of my feelings. She knew I'd come around when I was ready, and I think it's time to move on to the next chapter of my life.

"I'm glad you're back bro," Mike said patting my shoulder before heading to another room to call up our drummer.

"We're going to go shopping," Addie said giving me a quick kiss, "We'll be back later so you guys can get to work. Also I'll pick up the kids."

"Thank you 80," I said with a soft smile forming on my lips, "For everything."

"I love you Billie Joe," she said softly before following Brittney out the front door.

My attention turned back to the book and I shook my head. It's time to start over, be there for my kids and my wife. Focus on my band and music.

"Tre is on his way," Mike said interrupting my thoughts. He slung his arm around my shoulders and sent me a kind smile, "I'm glad you're back."

"I'm glad to be back."

Things are going to get better from here, I can just feel it. 

Thank you for reading everyone! This is the last chapter, however I'm writing the Epilogue right now as well.

It should be posted within the next hour or so. 

Stay beautiful, and keep a look out for my new Billie Story! It's going to be called 'Drown'.