Shackled and Broken

HATE

           He came back in to the room a while later, switching on the light. "Remember yet?" He asked. I looked away, avoiding his gaze. "Answer me damn it!" He grabbed my hair and pulled it back, forcing me to look at him. I spat in his face. He wiped his eye as I smirked. It was a wrong move. This guy climbed on top of me and started hitting me left and right. "You!" Hit. "Will!" Hit. "Not!" Hit. "Do!" Hit. “That!" Hit. "Again!" Hit. "Will you!?" I shook my head, couching, feeling blood trickle from my nose. "Maybe you need help jogging your memory huh?" He unhooked me from the wall and nearly dragged me out of the room. I stumbled down the stairs and fell. "Get up." He snarled. I quickly did, not wanting to get a beating like that again. We made our way to what seemed like a living room as he forced me to knees in front of a couch. A kid about fifteen years old sat there looking like he was ready pee himself. My kidnapper clutched my hair and pulled back like before to make me look at the kid sitting in front of me. "Remember now?" He whispered in my ear.         

        I didn't remember. I had no idea who this kid was! I don't remember! He has dyed blue hair, blue eyes to match it, pale skin, and a small build. Suddenly, it all came rushing back to me.  I looked a little closer, imagined his features a little younger...more… innocent.
        No. I shook my head. It can’t be! How could he still remember!? How could I forget? "Please, I'm so sorry for what I did to you.  I was gullible. I didn't think what I was doing was wrong-"        
        "Wrong?" My kidnapper echoed. "How could you not think RAPING a kid was WRONG?"        
        "I didn't know! I'm sorry. Please… That was nearly five years ago.”        
        "And he still remembers." I shook my head, hating myself.  "Prudence," the boy croaked. "I don't want him looking at me." Prudence made me stand as I silently wept to myself.  Letting tears slip through the corners of my eyes.

We passed the stairs that led to the bedroom and went down a different hallway. At the end of the hall was a long staircase.  He shoved me down the stairs leading to a basement. He opened the door and pulled me inside. "Filth like you should be off the streets," he said, throwing me down on the cold concrete floor.  "Jasper came to me after what you did to him! He was only twelve!” I buried my face in my chained hands, crying like a child.        
         I was fourteen when I hurt Jasper.  The older guys in the gang said if I did what I did then I'll become a man. Unfortunately, I believed them. Now look where it got me.

"Who knows how many others you raped?" Prudence spat. "Who knows how many other families were told by the police that they could do nothing because they couldn't find the guy that did that to him. The main reason was because he could not speak about the incident for months! You broke something precious inside of him! You murdered his innocence!"        
        "I-I'm sorry,” I whispered. "Not sorry enough," he said, gritting his teeth. Prudence kicked me in the stomach causing me to double over. He started beating me again until I was bloody. I gasped in fear and in hatred in myself. Prudence gripped my chin, peering down on me. "You'll soon feel how Jasper feels. You will never forget what you did to him. Never. " He stood and walked out, leaving me a bloody mess.

 Jasper forgive me. I hate what I did to you. I deserve every second of this, but I’m not that person anymore. I'm so sorry…