Carolina ~ A Slash Love Story

Mama Kin

Three weeks later, we were all getting along well enough, but we weren't necessarily friendly. I guess we were merely civil (which was surprising enough). Things were mostly neutral.

The boys played a few scattered shows along the coast, but I stayed at home, knowing that being on the road with them this early on would be a bit of a mess; we were all inexperienced, and I didn't want to add to the confusion and stress.

When they came back, they told me of all of the incidents and mishaps, but the were still ecstatic; they all had a bit of a glow to them- like a new life. They were happier, but they could act a little strange at times, almost like something had happened that they didn't want to talk about- or like they were hiding something.

Slash was making my head hurt; he was adorable and lovable, but I didn't want to like him. He had so many asshole moments that it made me want to hurt him, but he was so cute that I couldn't. He had a puppy like quality, almost like, 'sure, he's an ass, but he's so damn cute.'

Axl was also driving me crazy; the 'old' part of me was still head over heels for him, and it was pressing for me to take advantage of his attention. The 'new' part me wanted to stay away from him. With both guys, I had the problem of simultaneously liking them and hating them; I couldn't win with myself.

"Carolina?"

"Yes, Kell?" I asked Kelly, who's head was in my lap as I played with his hair while we watched MTV.

"Do you think that you and I will ever," he paused for a moment, thinking of how to phrase the end of his question, "be a thing? Like a couple."

"I don't know," I said honestly.

Kelly was a great guy, but I wasn't so sure that I felt that way about him anymore. The idea of he and I being in a relationship wasn't bad, but it wasn't as appealing as it once was. He was a wonderful person, but something was different. I decided that it had to do with the Slash and Axl confusion; I didn't want to add a third option and make more of a mess by dragging Kelly into the weird situation.

"I mean, I think we could work."

"We'd be cute," I said, nodding in agreement.

"We' probably have cute kids someday."

"Most likely," I said with a chuckle.

A few minutes of silence ticked by, the T.V. playing one of David Bowie's music videos.

"What's your plan of action with the guys in Guns N' Roses?" he asked softly.

"What do you mean?"

He sighed and opened his pretty brown eyes, shifting his gaze up to me.

"Tracii feels like you're ditching us."

"How? I hardly hang out with them."

"Yeah, but he's weird about you; it's like you're one of his few old friends and he doesn't want to lose you."

"Which I can appreciate, but that's stupid that he thinks I'm ditching you guys."

"Well, think about it," he said, sitting up slowly, "when was the last time we all hung out?"

"I don't know."

"Exactly, a while ago-"

"We're hanging out now."

"Yeah, you and I not you and the rest of the band. When was the last time you saw Mick? Or even Steve?"

"Kelly, please don't start this with me. I see you when I can; I don't see my brother's band that often, and even if I did, why do you care so much?"