Everyday Thoughts. Collection of writings and poems.

Loss

There we were, God we were having so much fun. My hand in yours, trailing after you. You led me around, booth to booth. The things they sold were interesting, but I didn't pay much attention. You were the main attraction in my eyes.
We walked by the rides, you didn't want to go on any, but I didn't mind. As long as I was with you. You walked to the field, not many people were there. Most of them where walking through the cluster of little shops and quickly-put-together rides.
You had that look on your face, and you grabbed me. I pulled away and we play fought for awhile. You were so much stronger than me, but it was still fun for both of us. Every time you ended up on top. We'd laugh, and then you'd kiss me. I felt so much love for you. You said you loved me so much, and I believed you.
The sun almost started to set. Together we walked underneath a bridge, finding a bench to sit on. It was cold and quiet there, the air feeling... off. It just didn't feel right, but that was okay, you were with me.
You kissed me with such a calm passion. I felt you just... Change. I don't know what it was.
I sat with my hand on your leg, yours on mine. We stared up at the concrete in silence; One that made you wonder, yet still made you feel comfortable.
Then you sighed.. Heavy eyes at first, then they changed to something else. I almost read 'I don't care', although they probably were emotionless. You opened your mouth to break the silence, and though you spoke quiet, your words cut the air.
"I can't do this anymore. I'm done"
You pulled away from me.
My voice tried to reply, " why.? What do you mean?" Though it was almost inaudible.
Your eyes seemed judgmental, I didn't know what I had done.
"Happy anniversary, but I'm done. With us. I can't do this anymore."
With no more explanation than that, you turned and left me sitting there.
I sat, alone, until long after the sun had set.

He left me, cold. Alone. Confused. Afraid.
With no feelings at all. What had changed?
We had such a wonderful day.. He had made me feel so good... Now... Now I'm left wondering what I had done.