Poems of a Lost Girl

Until I fall apart

Somethings tugging at my heart,

Well more like ripping at my lungs,

It makes breathing for me so hard

And puts a lump just behind my tongue

The looming threat of an unknown force,

A shadow lurking above and around me.

It swallows me up as it travels through it's course

Torturing my mind as it slowly surrounds me.

I cannot be still, I cannot slow down

I cannot rest until you are found.

I cannot wait, I cannot hide.

For the monsters linger deep inside.

There is no escape,

Believe me, i've tried.

It is my destiny, my fate;

To slowly kill myself inside.

I want to be free,

I want to be out of this place.

I wish someone would rescue me,

Save me from my past mistakes.

I feel so alone, yet surrounded by people

But no one who cares for me

I'm on my own, too many sheeple,

Each copycats with no individuality.

There is a rage deep inside me that demands attention,

But I wonder how long I can ignore it if I just don't mention.

It is boiling to the surface I can feel the tension,

I want to lash out with no instigation.

I am just so sick of all of the same shit,

From the same people doing the same things,

I feel used up, I feel raped.

I feel taken advantage of by those I thought I loved.

I have been let down, I have been left out

And I feel forgotten and neglected above all.

But I suck it, up play it off.

Even as you all slowly chip away at my heart.

I know I can survive, I do it all the time.

I can fight these feelings, ignore these cravings.

And slowly destroy myself from the inside out

Until I completely fall apart.