Naugthy games (a Tom Hiddleston/Benedict Cumberbatch story)

Acting out his pain

4 months later
*Tom*
"Are you insane Tom ? Do you want to ruin your fucking career ? Cause you are on your way to do just that". Luke was yelling at him on the phone.

That actually was just about how every conversation had gone with his publicist lately, and he knew he was wearing Luke's patience thin, something he hadn't thought possible.

"What is it this time Luke ? What have I done to get your knickers in a twist ?" Actually Tom could come up with several reasons for Luke to be angry with him, but he just didn't know which ones had gone public.

Luke sighed. "Where do you want me to start Tom ? Acting like an idiot at a big premiere, refusing to talk to either your fans or the media.. acting like a fucking diva ? Or what about getting into a bar fight with a famous rock star ? Or maybe fucking the director's wife getting yourself cut from the movie ? And that is just this week Tom".

Tom bit his lip, well it had been a hard week, and that rock star he had deserved it, he had been talking about Amber.. his Amber, the woman who had changed his life and was now ruining it.

He had tried everything, thinking that he would forget her if he kept occupied, he didn't DO love, he hadn't thought himself capable of love before he met her and he had ruined everything.

And now apparently he was ruining himself and his career to, the worst part, he actually didn't care, nothing really mattered anymore.

"Sorry Luke, I don't do it to annoy you, I just can't go around pretending to be all nice and happy when I feel like this". Tom rubbed his face.

Luke sounded a little less angry. "You know Tom, acting out, getting a reputation as a hot headed diva and fucking just about anything that moves, that ain't getting her back".

"I know, but she won't even talk to me, she has blocked my number.. I have been trying to forget her". He had called her and tried to talk to her for the first couple of weeks, but she ignored him.

He still had her key, and he had gone so far as to lock himself into her house a couple of times when she weren't at home, just to feel near her, feeling like some creepy stalker.

Luke sounded like he was talking to a kid. "You need to pull yourself together Tom, okay ? You got a premiere in two days, could you please try to clean up and fucking act normal ?"

"I don't want to go, Ben is going to be there". Tom groaned, he hadn't talked to Ben since that day either.

Luke sighed. "Yes of course he is.. it is his premiere, and you are going and you are behaving, this is the last chance Tom, if you fuck this up to, then I am out".

"Okay okay, I will go and I try not to do something stupid, but Ben better leave me alone or I can't answer for my actions". He closed his eyes, if Ben had just kept his mouth shut.

"I mean it Tom, it is my last warning, see you". And with that Luke hang up, and Tom slumped back on the couch.

He got up and poured himself a scotch, he knew he shouldn't, but he needed it, he needed it way to much lately.

Three hours later he found himself outside Ambers house, drunk as a skunk, needing to see her, but when no one answered the door, he locked himself in.

He walked through the house, looking at her stuff, smiling when things reminded him of her, ending up in her bedroom.

Tom knew he should be leaving, she could come home every minute, what would she say if she found him here ? She would probably kick his ass and in his state she most likely would succeed.

Her bed smelled like her, he realised when he threw himself on it, he curled up crying like a baby, breathing in her scent, shortly after he was fast asleep.

*Amber*
It had been a rough night, the band had been demanding, the music loud and the fans rowdy.

Her heart wasn't really in it lately, she felt dead on the inside, like her drive was gone.

She wanted to hate Tom, but she couldn't, she was angry with him but some part of her still loved him, but she couldn't use love for anything, he had shown her that.

As for Ben, she had been very angry and disappointed in him to, but they had been friends for a long time and after about a month she forgave him.

He had told her he did it because he was in love with her, but she had told him they could only be friends, no more benefits and he seemed to accept that.

Actually she hadn't been with any man since then.. she was confused, she didn't know what she wanted, she didn't feel like being in control anymore, that had been a facade, a way to keep men at an arm's length, not letting them close enough to hurt her.

But she just didn't like the idea of other men than Tom being in charge of her, she didn't trust them.

Tom certainly seemed to have moved on, he was seen with a new woman every week, lastly he lost his role in a big movie because he couldn't keep his hands of the directors young wife.

She unlocked her door, it would be so good to get a long night's sleep, maybe tomorrow would be better, maybe tomorrow that hole in her chest would be gone and she could feel whole again.

As she got into her bedroom she almost screamed, there was someone lying in her bed, but then she recognised him, what the hell was Tom doing, sleeping in her bed ?