take care

seventeen

Dear Pen,

Today's the day I've been dreading. It's November 7th, 2013 aka your 20th birthday.

I remember when we were kids you were a lot more excited about your 20th birthday then your 18th. Sure, when you're eighteen you can do a bunch of stuff but when you're twenty you would be an adult. We had been planning your birthday since we were sixteen and I never would have imagined you wouldn't be here to actually celebrate it with me.

The morning started out absolutely terrible. I woke up and Harry's arms weren't protectively around my waist like they usually were. I stumbled out of bed and into the kitchen and was glad to see Harry there making me breakfast. He had made eggs, bacon, toast, everything you would want for breakfast. He wasn't overly nice like some people are when you're in a bad mood. No, he just acted like his normal self which was a huge relief.

We spent the morning making small talk but I wasn't very happy. Harry gave up after thirty minutes and offered to wash the dishes for me even though it was my day. I was fine with it, I wasn't in the mood to do anything.

At eight o'clock was when things went bad. That was when I started looking at pictures of us. There were all sorts of them. Some of them were stupid selfies from when we were twelve while others were more formal. I found tears in my eyes and tried to wipe them away but they wouldn't cooperate.

Harry came up behind me, sitting on the floor as we admired the picture together. I looked up at him and had to hold in a sob. He too was crying, and that sight nearly broke me. I instantly started bawling and threw myself in his arms, making his shirt wet with my excessive crying. He just rubbed my back and placed me in his lap but unlike all the times he had done this to me before, it didn't make me feel better. After everything that had happened I had managed to get out of thinking of the incident but I knew now was the time to let it out.

"It was the middle of June." I choked out. Harry looked at me inquisitively. Everyone thought they knew the story as to what happened to you but they didn't.

"I had met up with Penelope in America. I hadn't seen her in months and I had really missed her. I didn't want a bunch of attention on the two of us so I planned her visit so we wouldn't be spotted. Sadly there was one person who spotted us."

Harry started telling me that I didn't need to tell him but he was wrong. Somebody needed to know the truth.

"We were going to go into a club, but we were going through the back entrance, so we had to go through an alley to get there. We didn't think much of it at the time and if we had known the consequences then I doubt we would have gone through that entrance." I took a shaky breath. This is where the truth came out. I had stopped sobbing at this point but I was still crying.

"This man came up to us with a gun in his hands. He pointed it towards us asking for our money. I said that we didn't have any, but he knew I was lying because apparently he knew who I was. I was quiet because I was so scared, but not Penelope. She kept on threatening to call the police. He pointed the gun at me and said, 'If you call the police I'll shoot him.'" I closed my eyes as I let some loose tears escape.

"I didn't know how we were going to get out of that situation. I... I had never been more terrified in my life. Everything happened so quickly after that. Penny's phone went off saying, '911, what's your emergency?', she jumped right in front of me, and a bullet went right through her chest. She fell to the ground instantly. I could tell she was in a lot of pain. All she could do was look up at me and say, 'Take Care, Niall. Then she closed her eyes, and never opened them again." I shuttered, thinking of that past memory. "The guy pointed a gun at me and threatened to kill me as well, but I was too traumatized to say anything. The police came shortly afterwards and the guy went to jail if I'm right."

Harry shook his head as I finished the story. I started sobbing as I had finally finished telling him the story. I was angry for some reason and started screaming.

"I was supposed to die, Harry! I should be dead right now and Penelope should be celebrating her birthday right now! I didn't tell her to jump in front of me, she wasn't supposed to risk her life for me! SHE SHOULD STILL BE HERE HARRY! I SHOULD BE DEAD, NOT HER, I WISH I JUST WOULD'VE DIED THAT NIGHT HARRY!!!"

Harry just pulled me into a tighter hug and cried with me. We stayed like that for another ten minutes when he put me down and said that he needed to use the bathroom.

He's been in there for twenty minutes and I can still hear him crying. Everybody knew that you had died, they even knew that you were murdered but nobody knew the whole story.

I'll update you tomorrow on the aftermath of everything, it's just too hard to write to you right now. Plus I need to see if Harry's all right, he's not taking this very well.

Take Care,

Niall xxx

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A/N I seriously almost forgot to update today. I've been so busy with honors band and stuff, but here I am! Honestly I feel as if I update too much (something I thought I would never say) so from now on there will be no more vote and comment thing (though you should still do that) and I'm just going to update on Fridays. I don't really like updating on Wednesdays because I'm so used to updating on the weekend so I'm changing it to Friday's from now on. Sorry if I upset anyone but it had to happen :/ Also I have started a contest for this book! You guys should check it out and enter and stuff ;) Well  anyways, this was the big chapter! The "incident" was finally revealed! What did you guys think? I put a song to the side and you guys should listen to it whilst reading this. Um, other things... oh yeah! Today this is dedicated to coldcoco because she's commented and voted before, and she just started reading my other story which made me happy so here you go!

Next Posting Date: February 7th