take care

forty five

Hello,

First, I would just like to apologize for my last letter. I was kind of in a bad mood, thus the new hole in Eleanor and Louis' kitchen. I know that you're all against violence and such, which is why I feel bad for doing that.

Well anyways, after that whole fiasco I went over to Zayn's house! His house is so cool. I swear, everyone on Tumblr would be jealous. There's vinyls all over the walls and, yes, he has an entire room decorated in graffiti. Also, his bath has a Jacuzzi! We may or may not have gotten our swim suits on and took a bubble bath (which indeed is very manly I may add).

The first thing we did was have Perrie fix up my hand. Eleanor tried to patch it all up, but she kind of failed because there was still blood and pain by the time I got over to the Zerrie residence. Perrie didn't freak like Eleanor normally does, she just took me to the bathroom and did the what was needed to fix me. As much as I love Eleanor (which I truly do, she's like another you, but of course not as awesome) it was nice to be with someone with a much different personality. 

Since I was there much earlier than planned, I hadn't been able to eat lunch or anything. I offered to make something because in the month I had lived with Eleanor and Louis I, not to brag or anything, learned to make a pretty mean grilled cheese. This made Perrie laugh (she laughs at most everything I say. I think she just likes my accent tbh), but she said that it was okay and that she would just get something from the grocery store to heat up or get some fast food. Zayn tried to give her money for it but she refused to take it because it was his birthday and since he was basically the queen of the world next to Beyonce she would buy it. I guess being compared to Beyonce was enough for Zayn to agree.

Once she left it was just the two of us. We made our way to his living room with the most comfortable couch my ass has ever touched. Then the most amazing thing happened. Their fluffy kitty walked over to me, sniffed my shoe, gave me a strange look, then jumped on top of me, stepping on my balls in the process. The cat decided that the most comfortable spot was on my chest, her tail flicking my nose making me sneeze. This made Zayn laugh (he definitely only laughs at me because of my accent). He took the cat off of me and placed her on top of him.

"Niall, you remember Prada." He said, "She's usually quite a bitch, but I guess she likes you."

I giggled and he laughed at my adorable Irish accent. Then it was quiet. At first it was quiet because there are times where there is just nothing to say. But then the silence became too much, overbearingly so. Luckily Zayn could tell that this silence needed to be dealt with, but he said all the wrong things.

"So you got the invite from Harry." Zayn stated.

I stole the cat from his arms, bringing her close. "Mhm." I mumbled.

"I'm guessing you didn't take it too well, huh?"

"You could say that." 

Zayn sat up, putting his arm around me. "Why did you react so... negatively?"

I sighed. "I just... it pissed me off. The only time we had any contact whatsoever was when I broke up that goddamn twitter fight and then he randomly invites me to a party? And I was just starting to get over him too and then he just had to ruin everything." I sighed again, resting my head in his lap, the cat leaping off me. "Why did I have to fall in love with him? It was stupid and our break up was inevitable, and I knew that but I still decided that my life was a book, which it clearly isn't, and everything was going to be just swell."

Zayn then asked me which changed me. As cheesy as it sounds, I think I'm changed forever. I don't know why but this little piece of information was so small and measly but oh so important. 

"Who said your life wasn't a book?" He asked.

I looked up at him, sitting back up as I then realized how close to his crotch I was. "It's just, it's not a book. I'm just waiting for life to write my happy little fairy tale ending where I fall in love with a beautiful prince and get married and have tons of amazing sex and get a sloth and adopt adorable little Asian babies but that's not how life works."

Zayn shook his head. "Of course that's not how life works, Niall. Life is about the journey, not the ending. What's the point of desert if you didn't have dinner first? Life doesn't write your book, Niall, you do. You write your own ending. You want a book? Write it. People always ask me why I'm so chill and laid back and the truth is because I found peace within myself and realized that life has it's ups and downs, but if you focus on the positives it is much more fun to live on this Earth. Because I realized that my happiness was just as important as others, and I wasn't going to let a little thing ruin everything. Write your story, Niall, it's much more exciting than anything you could ever read."

Of course I cried. Who doesn't cry when they hear Zayn Malik give an inspirational speech? I cried so hard that Prada came back down to comfort me. 

By the time Perrie came back home with food, I was done crying. I had cried so much recently that I was all cried out. 

The rest of the day was amazing. After some pretty crappy McDonald's (not as good as my grilled cheese but oh well) we baked cookies, watched How I Met Your Mother, played board games, terrorized the animals with a laser pointer, and had Perrie make us some scalloped potatoes because it was Zayn's birthday and he loves those things even more than I do. Somehow after that we managed to strip to our underwear and take a bubble bath together (as previously mentioned). Zayn even pulled Perrie in with us, making us all laugh. 

I will admit that we did something I'm not too proud of (kind of). We got high. Oh no, college aged boys doing college aged things! Yeah, I told Zayn how the only way to forget about everything was to read books and he was like, "Hey, I don't do this often anymore, but since it's my birthday, wanna get high?" I did get high. It was quite amusing. 

After getting stoned as fuck, Zayn and I got hungry and ate all of the cookies. Perrie, again, thought I was hilarious. Apparently I'm very cuddly when I'm high and wouldn't put my pants back on unless Zayn gave me a kiss (So yes, kissing Zayn Malik can now be checked off my bucket list). I don't even know why or how my pants were off in the first place but it was worth it. Though being high was fun, it did wear off after a while and I don't plan on doing it again. Still, drugs are bad and you shouldn't do them unless you are in Zayn Malik's house on his birthday. That is the only exception to the rule.

Soon after we all made a little fort in the living room with blankets and pillows. All of the animals are now snuggled up all against us (Prada claimed me. I think I'm her new human) and we are currently watching How To Train Your Dragon because yes. Zayn actually told me to go and write in my "little notebook thingy" which I thought was quite sweet.

All in all I would say that today was quite eventful. I'm actually quite proud of myself for having two journal entries in one day! I think I deserve a gold star. But in all seriousness, I am so happy that I went over here to celebrate Zayn's birthday. He didn't really drill me about how I was feeling and if Harry was still on my mind because he already knew. I'm not happy and Harry seems to always be on my mind. He was just smart enough to realize that nothing he could do would change that (except give me drugs).

I love you Penny and sorry for smoking pot without you. It won't happen again.

Take Care,

Niall

P.S. I really need to stop saying tbh, it's getting on everyone's nerves

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A/N I've never done drugs, but I would gladly get high with Niall Horan. Well hello there everybody, how are you? It is currently still Christmas in America which also means that it is still currently my birthday :) Sorry for being gone for so long, I had writers block (again). Hopefully I won't take so long to get the next chapter out. That's really all I have for this chapter. Nothing too exciting here. Dedicated to Zayn Malik for being rad af (oh god it's late and I can't believe I said that ew)