I Can Be Happy (JongKey/OnKey)

Is This The Losing Hand That Time Has Placed?

That morning Kibum woke up alone to the sound of his phone text tone. He rubbed his eyes trying to remember the night before and picked up his phone.

Minho: What happened last night?

Minho: Jinki's being vague and I'm worried

Minho: You didn't say anything right?

Minho: Please don't tell me you slipped up and hurt Jinki

Kibum: I don't remember what happened, Jinki was with me last night? When I was drunk?

Minho: He called wanting to know where you were and I told him to come pick you up

Kibum: Minho I fucked up

Kibum: I said Jonghyun's name, I remember now

Kibum: I said the wrong name and he looked at me so hurt, like I had just shot him

Kibum: God damn it why did you tell him to come get me??

Minho: I was doing what was best, I didn't know you were going to let him know you love Jonghyun

Kibum: He left after that, I fucked up so bad

Minho: Yes you did, I'm going to see if he's okay. Don't come after him, I don't think he'll be happy to see you

Kibum: I'm going to tell Jonghyun

He ignored the protest texts that came afterward and instead grabbed his coat and started out the door. He knew he looked like a mess, and he knew that if he didn't hurry Minho might try to stop him, but at this point nothing matter more than finally telling Jonghyun how he felt. Kibum felt he had ruined too many things by keeping this in for so long, so today he was determined to do something about it.

Kibum knocked on Jonghyun's door and waited patiently for him to answer. The older smiled when he opened the door, but this time Kibum couldn't smile back.

"Hey Kibum, what's up?" Jonghyun asked.

"Jonghyun I have something to tell you" He answered seriously.

"What is it?" Jonghyun asked understanding the seriousness.

"I made a mistake all those months ago with not telling you this when I should've, and I'm having to pay for that now, but I don't want to make the same mistake again so that's why I'm here now" Kibum started.

"You're scaring me with that talk" Jonghyun told him but Kibum ignored him.

"Kim Jonghyun I am so in love with you it hurts, I've loved you for a long time now. The day of you and Chaeyeong's one year anniversary I was going to tell you to get it off my chest, but I didn't and instead I tried to forget you. I started dating Jinki to forget you, but now Jinki's been hurt by my foolishness and he should never forgive me for what I've done" Kibum blurted out, and he drank in the lack of shock on Jonghyun's face.

"I wish I could return the feelings Kibum, but I don't like you that way and I have Chaeyeong who I love and plan to marry" Jonghyun replied, sympathy where Kibum thought shock should be.

"I know, that's why this is also a goodbye. I don't want you to pity me and I don't want to make the same mistakes again, so I'm getting out of your life. I'm sure I'll be able to find someone else, or maybe I can start over with Jinki. Either way, I'm going to forget about you starting today" Kibum told him, "Goodbye, Kim Jonghyun" Kibum spoke before Jonghyun could get a word in.

"Kibum..." Jonghyun said as the younger turned around, trying to forget the pain in Jonghyun's face.

Then the tears started to fall, and Kibum didn't care enough to wipe them away. He was going to be happy without him, because all he brought was pain. He was going to be happy for once, and he was going to make sure of it. He wasn't going to make himself or anyone else suffer anymore.

Kibum hadn't taken but a few steps before someone grabbed his arm and turned him around. His scared eyes met Minho's and they stayed still for a second, no one talking or moving, as if time froze.

"What did you do?" Minho asked him, scared of the answer although Kibum was sure he had heard it all.

"I..." Kibum took a deep breath to collect himself, "I let him go"

"You two have known eachother for so long, and you're going to let this ruin all of that?" Minho asked and Kibum took his arm back.

"What am I supposed to do? Keep hurting the people who care about me because I can't get over him?!" Kibum wanted to yell, but they were still too close to Jonghyun's house.

"There are many other ways you can get over him, it doesn't have to be this painful for both of you" Minho tried to reason with him.

"But it does, doesn't it? No matter what I do I see only him and I've hurt one of the people I care about" Kibum replied, tears coming back to him.

"Kibum, I know it's painful, but you can get through this, with all of us by your side" Minho tried to calm him.

"I've been trying to get past this for months Minho, and now I've lost Jinki because of it" Just hearing himself say it made Kibum tear up, "What else can I do?"

Minho watched as Kibum lowered himself to the ground, crouching down as he cried harder. Minho crouched down beside him and rubbed his back softly, letting him cry and let out all of his emotions. That's when his phone vibrated and Minho knew it was from Taemin.

Taemin: Jinki knew about it this whole time, he was hoping he could change him

Taemin: He's just crying now, I feel so bad for him

Minho: He knew about Kibum's feeling for Jonghyun?

Taemin: Yeah, ever since he noticed Kibum drinking around midnight. He overheard a phone call one night

Taemin: How is Kibum?

Minho: He's crying as well

Minho: He just cut Jonghyun out of his life, confessed to him and then told him goodbye

Taemin: This is a mess, don't tell Kibum that Jinki knew

Minho: I won't, let me know if anything else happens

Taemin: I will, I love you

Minho: I love you too

"I... I love Jinki so much" Kibum spoke softly, "H-He left thinking I di-idn't love him. I have to fix it" Kibum began to get up at that statement.

Minho rose with him but grabbed his arm to stop him for a moment.

"Are you sure this time? That you love Jinki?" Minho asked, his tone serious.

Kibum averted his gaze from Minho, giving the question some thought. He looked up at the younger slowly and their eyes met before he spoke.

"I love him more than anything" Kibum answered seriously, and Minho let go of his arm.

"I'm coming with you" Minho announced as he followed Kibum to the apartments.

"Why?" Kibum asked as they approach his car.

"I want to be there for you in case anything happens" Minho answered and Kibum unlocked his car.

"Get in" Kibum ordered and Minho complied

"Are you just going to show up without warning?" Minho asked once they were in the car.

"He may protest otherwise, but I need to properly apologize to him" Kibum answered, his sad mood seemingly gone, replaced with a sense of seriousness and pain.

"Taemin is with him right now, I'm going to let them know we're coming" Minho announced and got out his phone.

"Don't, they may tell Jinki" Kibum told him, "I need to do this, and I don't need anyone trying to stop me"

Minho sighed and nodded, slipping his phone back in his pocket as Kibum began to drive.

AN: Three months later, so sorry for making you guys wait so long. I hope you enjoyed~