Thinking out loud

loving you is easy, being with you is hard

**Ashley in pic**

Ashley woke up in Rob's arms, she rolled over and smiled as she ran her fingers through his hair making him smile in his sleep.
She giggled when he opened one eye then closed it when he found her watching him making him blush.
"What are you blushing for"? She asked laughing when he pulled her closer and kissed her.
"Shut up and kiss me" he whispered before kissing her again.

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Ashley and Rob were watching a movie together when he looked down at her and kissed her cheek.
"What was that for"? She asked still watching the movie.
"Just because" he said kissing her again and stealing a handful of popcorn from her.
"Get your own" she said smacking his hand away when he went for a second handful of popcorn.
"Mean" he said getting up to pop his own.
As Rob stood there waiting on his popcorn to be ready he watched Ashley as she sat on his couch with nothing on but one of his t shirts and her hair pulled up in a bun; she looked absolutely beautiful, he couldn't see her baby bump from here but he remembered what she looked like with it.
He smiled as he thought of nights like this happening every night.
With his mind made up Rob grabbed his bag of popcorn and sat back down on the couch.
"Move in with me" he said when a commercial came on. He watched as she froze.
"What"? She questioned looking at him with wide eyes.
"I said move in with me" he said leaning forward and kissing her lips. Ashley kissed him back and soon Rob moved her from the couch to straddling his lap.
"You know I can't" she said panting from kissing him so long.
"Why not"? He asked running his hands up and down along her thighs.
Goosebumps covered the skin that his hands touched.
"You know I can't" was all she said before leaning back in to kiss him.
"No I don't know, I think you're making excuses" he said turning them over so she was on her back on the couch.
"Rob please" was all she could say as he kissed along her jawline and neck.
"Please what"? He questioned kissing her cheek then looking into her green eyes.
"Don't ruin this moment please. You know as well as I do that I need to go back to Julian" she said kissing his lips lightly.
"Okay I won't , just please don't let this be the last time between us" he said lifting up her shirt and closing his eyes as he slid inside of her in one thrust.

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After making love to Rob again Ashley had went upstairs and took a shower as her clothes from yesterday washed.

Ashley sighed as she finished putting on her clothes and stood up debating on going back to Julian.
"You don't have to leave" Rob said behind her wrapping his arms around her.
"I do need to, I owe it to Julian" she said as Rob sighed defeated.
"What does this mean for us"? He asked running a hand through his hair.
Ashley looked down and bit her lip then looked up at Rob cupping his face with her hand and kissing his lips before whispering "loving you is easy, being with you is hard" before going out the door and getting in the taxi she had called.

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Ashley got the taxi to drop her off at the park where her car was left, she sighed as she got in and headed back home to Julian.

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As soon as she opened up the door alcohol was the only thing she could smell, holding her nose she walked through the house kicking empty vodka bottles out of her way.
"Jules" she called out waiting for him to respond but when she didn't get one she sighed as she figured he was passed out somewhere.
The stench of the alcohol halfway through the house almost made her sick but she was able to push it back. "Babe" she called out again hoping he would answer so she could sit down.
There was still no answer so she made her way upstairs.
"Julian" she said pushing him, trying to get him to wake up when she found him on their guest bedroom.
"What"? He asked groggily not yet opening his eyes.
"Julian what have you been doing"? She asked before going in the bathroom to get a cup of water and a bottle of tylenol.
When she came back in the room he was sitting up on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.
"Here this will help" she said putting the cup of water in front of him but stumbled back when Julian smacked it out of her hands. "I don't want that" he said looking away from her angrily.
"Julian why are you drinking"? Ashley asked again but jumped as he yelled.
"IT HELPS TAKE THE PAIN AWAY OKAY NOW STOP ASKING QUESTIONS".
Ashley shook her head at him "you don't mean that" she said walking towards him.
"You cheated on me , I've been trying my best to show you that I love you and you go and spend the night with the guy that's been trying to take you away from me ever since we got together" he spat.
"I love you Julian , you know I do I'm sorry about all of this but you can't start drinking like this" she said gently running her fingers through his hair.
"Do you love me"? Julian asked looking up at her.
"Yes" she answered without hesitation.
"Then tell me the truth what did you and Rob do last night"? He asked still looking up at her but shook his head when she couldn't hold his gaze.
"You fucked him again. Didn't you"? He asked getting up angrily.
"Damn't Ashley I would give you my all and you just keep going back to him" he said scowling at her.

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Julian was furious now she could tell but a pain in her stomach was making it hard for her to concentrate.
"Julian" she said trying to get his attention but he was still yelling at her about sleeping with Rob again.
"Julian please" she whispered holding her stomach.
"WHAT" he yelled finally turning to look at her but realization dawned on his face finally
"The baby?" he asked rather than stated and when Ashley nodded her head yes and bit her lip he rushed forward and picked her up taking her downstairs to the car.