Thinking out loud

change

After her talk with Julian not much had changed with him, he was still drinking on a regular basis. Ashley still lived with him but when he got to out of control she would take Meaghan with her and go to Rob's. A part of her still hoped that Julian would change his ways but as the days passed by she was starting to realise that the Julian that she fell in love with had changed, of course what she had done in their relationship was wrong and she took full responsibility for her actions but they had a baby now.
Rob surprised her at how he stepped up and started to help take care of Meaghan when Julian was drunk, he genuinely loved being around her child and took the initiative to take care of her anytime she cried.
It seemed as if her life was a mess but also seemed like her problems were so simple when she thought about just living with Rob. He of course brought it up everytime she was over at his house but when she looked at her daughter she only wanted her to have the same childhood that she had which was one where both parents stayed together, it was rare to find kids now a days that their parents were still married. Of course her and Julian weren't married but they still loved each other.... Right? Ashley found herself doubting this whenever Julian would come home with lipstick on his neck and she doubted it even more so when she was in bed with Rob. It felt like that was where she should be, where she belonged.

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When Rob was with Ashley he made sure to show her how much she meant to him , he saw this as a second chance at being with her and he wasn't going to screw it up.
The media was of course having a field day with all the drama, every week they had pictures of Ashley going on both Rob and Julian's house. The media was crucifying Ashley as well as Patriots fans for breaking up the team and making them loose games. When Ashley would go stay with Rob he didn't dare turn on the tv. Rob's family had been very supportive of the two and had even offered to let Ashley come stay with them to get away from the spotlight but she declined the offer.

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Julian's thoughts seemed to always be a scrambled mess , when he drank his thoughts seemed more clear. He knew that he was pushing away Ashley and it hurt but the pain of knowing she slept with his best friend hurt more. His mom and dad had called him after seeing the news and had simply told him that they supported any decision that he made.
He was currently sitting at a local bar with his head in his hands, the bartender now knew him as a regular and had no problem sitting shit after shot in front of Julian, his bill was always the highest so he was more than happy to let him get drunk at his bar.
A pretty girl would walk in on occasion or if he drank enough he didn't care what she looked like. They would talk a little, the girls would of course know he played for the New England Patriots , he would kiss them, caress them and then take them to the nearest hotel. Even in his drunken state he knew what he was doing, he knew he wasn't having sex with Ashley but as he was having sex with the girl underneath him that's who he was thinking about.

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Ashley thought about how much everything had changed within the past few months and thought about the future as well.
She mostly thought about Meaghan, she was her top priority now and she knew that no matter what all had changed that a decision had to be made.
She didn't know how much more she could go through, she was tired of crying and tired of the media knowing everywhere she went and who she was with.
She couldn't help but smile though as Meaghan smiled up at her and clapped her hands.
No matter what she had her baby and that's all that matters.