Complicated

33. Cherish It While You Got It.

When Courtlen walked off, he was going to no other than Abby's house. He was going to break the news to her and somewhat expecting comfort from his rant. When he got to her house, he took a deep breath and knocked loudly a couple times. Awkwardly, Abby's mom came to her door. She gave Courtlen a dirty look as he gave a nervous demeanor back. "Um, hi miss Seay.. is Abby here? I really need to talk to her."

"I don't think she wants to so--"

"Miss Seay! Please.." Abby's mom squinted her eyes at him. She could a slight desperation build in his face. "..I'll go get her."

"Thank you." Courtlen stuffed his hands in his pockets and waited for Abby. When she showed up to the door, his eyes widened a bit. Abby's stomache got bigger since the last time he saw her; she was practically twenty-one weeks into her pregnancy. "Hey Courtlen.. haven't seen you in a while. Where you been?" He broke out his daze at Abby's stomache. "Um.. You still got that bench swing in your backyard?"

"Yea, I was just there.. why?"

"I wanna talk with you there, if that's cool." Abby smirked and nodded. They made their way through the house to the back door that lead to her patio. A quarter of her backyard was taken up by patio furniture; near the corner of the house and the wooden fence was the bench swing that Courtlen referred to. Abby struggled her pregnant self to sit and Courtlen slumped himself next to her. "Soo.." Abby said. "I got into an arguement with my family.."

"Why?"

"They keep shootin' me down. I don't like that shit. It's gone on for so long so I let 'em have it."

"Do you think that was the right thing to do? You being here just to say that means that it meant something to you.."

"Nah.. I feel kinda bad.. that's still my fam, ya know."

"Then you probably should apologize for-"

"Hell no! They deserved it!"

"Apologize how you came across your point, not for what you meant about it. You only have one sister, two parents and.. Chresanto; you shouldn't be disrespecting them for watching out for you. They care about you; they just think that your decisions are getting you into harm's way. Cut them some slack." Courtlen leaned back and swung the bench a little. He took a deep breath, "I get what you're sayin'.."

"Good! Now take my advice into consideration and go say sorry."

"Later. I still wanna talk."

"You got more news? Oh lord.." Abby chuckled. "Yea.. after graduation, I'm going into the army." Abby stopped chuckling and blankly stared at Courtlen. "Why?" she calmly asked. "Because I don't wanna go to college if I know I'm not gonna set my mind to it. I can't make no money for you and our daughter--"

"Imani."

"Wait what?"

"I want to name her Imani. What do you think?"

"..I like it.. alot actually." Abby quickly smiled and went back to a straight face. "Okay, keep going."

"I can't make money for you and.. Imani, from working double shifts at some CVS. I rather just go to war while y'all can get supported. I don't care if I'm coming back without arms or legs or even my dick, I don't care but I'm coming back to see Imani."

"Are you sure this what you want to do?"

"Never been so sure in my life." Abby sighed and without warning, held on to Courtlen's chin and kissed him as if it was the time she ever will. Still holding on to his chin, she detached her lips from his, "I believe you. Do us proud." They both smiled, leaned back and rocked into the bench. They sat there for an hour or two, which felt like minutes. They basked in each other's silence; not an awkward silence, but it was comfortable and nice. Things like that are precious and meaningful and worth keeping.