Ballet Shoes, Angel's Hair and Revolution (A Les Misérables fanfiction)

Chapter 26

A.N.: My dear friends, this chapter is extra long, however it was necessary! Buckle up because you're in for a crazy ride! This chapter is dedicated to those who have waited so long for.... (you will see for what) As usual tell me what you think!
- love, Vi,
-------

By the time the meeting was over, I was almost shaking with fear. There was the most strange emotion spread in the air; a strange mixture of excitement and melancholy. I was slowly strolling around the room, curiously watching the men. I listened to their reports and plans and never failed to add my piece of mind. Whenever my eyes met one of the young men's, in their pupils, I saw the black void filled with wisdom far beyond their years. It was the wisdom of the old age that their the eyes would probably never live to see. I wished to stop the time right then and there in order to prevent the terrible things from happening.

I had to smile at them, I had to pronounce words of encouragement, even though I knew that they were just empty words without any meaning, words that I simply didn't believe in. I began doubting that I could actually stop this revolution. Even if I managed to make Enjolras fall for me, or even if I seduced him, would he truly hold me in such high regard to drop everything for me, and stop the men from fighting?

I had to breathe, or else I would hyperventilate and show the men my weakness, but I couldn't afford that. The last thing that I wished at that instant was Enjolras believing that I have fallen ill or that I am scared by the prospect of upcoming revolution. That actually wouldn't be so far from the truth because, to be honest, I was terrified. Fortunately, none of the boys seemed to have noticed the defects in my perfect composure.

Almost.

As I was walking around the room, I felt a pair of attentive eyes following my every single step. At some point, I stopped suddenly when I felt that uncomfortable feeling on the back of my neck, and quickly turned my head to catch the stalker red-handed. My eyes locked with big brown ones. He didn't look away, on the contrary, he enforced his stare, once more seeming to ask me a silent question. I flet the urge to speak to him, but I knew I couldn't. Not here, not with everyone present. I wanted to give him a sign of sorts however, in that same moment, Enjolras called the end of the meeting.

The room was filled with noisy, careless conversations again, and I felt dizzy once more. I couldn't listen to their laughter. I was unable of spending anymore time with them without cracking. I had to be alone. I took the advantage of the sudden commotion and disappeared on the stairs leading back to the main chamber of the Cafe Musain.

Bearly withholding my tears, I run through the cafe and back to the living part of our house, only to disappear inside my room once more. When the wooden door shut behind me, I burst into tears.

"No" I whispered through my tears, "This cannot possibly be happening," I mumbled to myself, feeling that my teeth are beginning to chatter, I was shaking. The revolution couldn't be possibly happening so soon, I couldn't simply agree on that.

I took a deep breath and I walked up to to my bureau and slowly sat down. I looked down at the letter that I have written not so long ago in the state of sweet ignorance, and I wanted to laugh at the irony of my life. I decided not to cross out anything, nor to start writing anew, I simply grabbed my steel nib pen, and constantly sobbing, I dipped the pen in the ink, and with a heavy heart I began writing post-scriptum;

The aforementioned urgent meeting turned out to be of crucial importance, dear sister. I have just found out that General Lemarque has cholera, and that there is no hope left for the poor man, he's given a several weeks of life at most, if God is generous. The rebellion will start at his funeral, as it was planned. The students are not quite ready but they know they need to act upon the event of Lemarque's death, otherwise the people will not stir. We're running out of time, Louise, and I am almost desperate. I have done everything I could to prevent this... but now I'm afraid it's too late. I had planned to slowly find my way to Enjolras' heart, but now this plan seems to have become impossible to fulfill. The ball will be the last chance to influence Enjolras' mind but I'm afraid that this ridiculous revolution means too much for him. I am so angry, dearest Louise, why do they choose to die when there is so much to live for? The world without these boys will be such a horrible place, my sweet sister. I wish I could gift them all with protection and guarantee their safety but they are so stubborn. I finish now, my sweet sister. Write swiftly, I need your words of comfort.