Don't Let Me Drown

Nine

Avi's POV

I couldn't sleep at all last night after the show. Usually, I knock out right after a show but I couldn't. I was leaving tomorrow and tonight I was saying goodbye to everyone. My heart was heavy, I was restless, and most of all I was back in my darkness as if the past two months hadn't happened at all.

I left a note for dad saying I was taking Doug for a walk. I didn't say when I'd be back, I just needed to walk and clear my mind. I found a park and lay in the grass with Doug. I had worked him a bit, then again we've been walking for almost two hours now.

"You're good company Doug, I'm gonna miss you" I scratched behind his ears and he leaned more into my hand. I smiled and sat up, he instantly moved into my lap. I didn't want to cry, not right now at least, but my vision was completely blurred with tears. My entire life I felt like shit and the one time I finally feel happy is being taken away from me tomorrow. It honestly sucks more than the prostitutes that work the corner at my last foster home.

Come back please, we have to start getting ready- dad 🐢

I sighed and decided to get an Uber back home. I was too tired to walk another two hours back and I had to carry Doug since he was over the walk as soon as I was. When we did get back, I gave Doug some fresh food and water before heading to my room. I texted dad I was here, and not even a minute later her knocked on my door.

"Come in" I said while Doug and I cuddled on my bed.

"Couldn't sleep?" I shook my head and kept petting Doug.

"You want to stay in bed a little longer?" I sighed and turned around nestling myself into dad's chest. "What's going on?"

"I don't want to go back into the darkness, I've never felt happiness and here with everyone I do. It sucks that it's just being taken away" I said not meeting his gaze."Before I met everyone, I feared for my life every day. I didn't know if I was gonna survive another day. Each day I'd sigh in relief I was still alive, I don't want to fear for my life anymore"

"I'm so sorry darling" he said wiping away my tears. "I promise you, you'll be okay"

"How do you know that dad? What if I go back to that same family?" I started shaking and he held me against his chest.

"Do you ever go back to the same families?" I shook my head. "Then there's nothing to worry about. I have a hearing with a judge tomorrow, I'm hoping he can give me my license and I can get you super quick. It won't be too long darling" I held onto him and he kissed the top of my head.

"I hope it won't, I love you dad" I said.

"I love you too Avi, start getting ready please, everyone will be over soon" we both got off my bed and I grabbed my towel. I had this really cool wireless speaker in my bathroom and I connected my phone to it to play 90210 by Blackbear featuring G-Eazy. I let the music play while the water started to heat up and fog up the bathroom. I grabbed my pipe and stash to smoke a bit before actually showering.

I asked dad if it was cool if I smoked and he was okay with it, as long as I still focused on starting up my company and didn't stink up my room. Hence why I'm smoking in a fogged up bathroom. It didn't leave a smell at all and I always opened the window after I did too because I wanted to follow his and Erin's rules.

After my shower I went back to my room a bit stoned. I blow dried my hair and let it do its own thing. I did some eyeliner and put on a dark blue liquid lipstick for makeup today, I like to change it up every now and then. I slipped on my moon and star suspender tights, black destroyed denim shorts, and my black tribal dreamcatcher muscle tank. We were having a barbecue today for my "See You Soon" party, I didn't come up with the name, so I slipped my alien dad hat on. I put on my glasses, amethyst plugs, mom's necklace and ring, an atlas ring Mike and Alysha gave me, and my black Dr. Martens boots.