Host of Imperfections

Chapter 31

Two Weeks Later

See eventually, I will get through this but right now it seems my hearts in the way.

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This year Valentines Day ended up being just another day in my book. It was crazy how just two months ago I was head over hills about somebody and BAM they just disappear like that. I was yet another single bitter soul on this whack ass holiday where couples overtly display their love for one another and rub it in the faces of those who have NO ONE.

I mean I had some one not too long ago but I guess if we're being honest here, I had no one else to blame but myself for my current predicament. Yeah it was my fault but things really didn't have to be taken to this extreme on Jay's part. I hadn't heard a word from him since he walked out in haste after hearing the news and gripping me up like a mad man. I wasn't even mad at that to tell the truth, he didn't hurt me or anything but the fact that he's gone so long without contacting me was what disturbed me. I guess we were really over but I needed confirmation.

I won't even say he's any less of a man for not even letting me know first because I for one am still struggling with my pride and dignity for not being woman enough to tell him about his child. This was just all one big misunderstanding. I needed him to see where I was coming from without him wanting to wring my neck. I'd give him his time to cool off now but I swore up and down the next time I saw him, if given the chance he was going to hear me out. I was going to make him listen, whatever the cost may be.

That night, I thought I was doing something by staying my ass inside and not going in public where I'd be forced to witness all the lovey dovey mess going on between couples. Michelle's boo otherwise known as her fianc�e, Jamal was in town. It just sickened me to know how long they'd been together. Their relationship sort of reminded me of Tarja and Malik's.

They'd been through whirlwinds together but still remained at peace till this day like nothing ever happened. I guess true love is able to conquer it all. They gave me hope. One day, I'd find the one. I was hoping he was right under my nose- I just had to do some things and work my power to get him to trust me again.

With Michelle being all concerned with me and my problems lately I had to admit, I was a little surprised when she asked me to tag along with them out to dinner. I looked at her like she'd lost her mind. I would've never had heart enough to ask somebody that. I loved my friends and all but why the hell would I want my depressed friend to come out on a romantic date with my man and I to ruin the mood.

"Yall go ahead. I'll be okay." I told her.

"You sure? I rather you come along instead of sitting around here looking like death." She stifled a laugh and I eyed her like I was falsely offended.

"I'm just sayin...." She tried redeeming herself. "When's the last time you combed your hair girl?"

"Don't start with me." I laughed making her do the same. "I been layin down on this couch since I got back from class..thats why it look like that..."

"My point exactly, come go with us."

Jamal descended from the bathroom like he was set to go waiting for Michelle to stop running her mouth but he joined on in.

"What's on the agenda tonight Bee? I know you got a hot date." If only he was aware that his girl was trying to get me to invade theirs.

"Nope! Valentines Day is SO overrated.." I harrumphed and he gave me one of those looks like he had crossed the line or something. Yeah, I know- Only people who aren't in love or heartbroken say that.