compare scars

sixteen

"Hey guys." Dan smiled, his hands shaking the slightest.

Despite how comfortable he felt with his class, nothing could have prepared him for today. John Low Highschool had a suicide prevention day each year. And for the whole day teachers and their first period class would spend watching sob stories and eventually eating cookies.

None of the teachers ever took it seriously, using the day as a time to get caught up on grading. Kyle had told him this, which only angered him more.

Dan knew firsthand the struggle. He couldn't believe that teachers, his coworkers would throw away something so valuable away. He himself promised to use the day, and maybe save someone's life.

"Hey I know today is suicide prevention day here. And I've heard that it's kind of a joke. But to me mental health is serious shit. Like guys you don't understand mental health is just like physical health in its effects. Yet we blame the person. I've never understood that." He laughed nervously.

Soon though there was no more nervous energy and him and the class could open up to each other.

"You all already know this. But about a month ago I was in the hospital." He rolled up his sleeves and showed the gash that was still healing on his wrist.

He could feel all the eyes on him, and he rolled back up his sleeve, wincing as his sleeve hit one of the stitches. It was a moment of insane vulnerability. He had never felt so vulnerable and weak and defenseless in his entire life.

All Dan wanted was to curl up in a ball and die.

That was until he heard another voice in the classroom.

"This was from two years ago when I was fighting Bulimia. My parents refused to believe that guys can have eating disorders." Matt stood up in his seat, showing the class a line of marks that marked his stomach.

For a second Dan had been taken aback. Matt wasn't exactly the picture of health as he was way too skinny, but dan would have never guessed. He would never think that the boy with a mop of curly black hair and strong cheekbones had been fighting just like he had.

One after another each of his students shared what they were or had been struggling with. Some were just struggling with school, something that he felt and understood. And others were fighting either mentally or physically and in some cases both.

"Is it okay if we watch some YouTube videos?" He asked the class after everybody had shared.

As a class they then watched 60 Reasons to Stay Alive. It was only a two minute video but the message was insane. That video he continued to watch in his low times, listening to all the beautiful aspects of life he would miss out on.

After that they lightened the atmosphere a little and talked about how to distract. The class agreed that music was the key. It unlike people would always be there for you, and didn't leave like people.

They then discussed bands and concert and the beauty of music. He let each student talk about their favorite bands and concerts they had been to.

He himself knew the power music had in people.

---

It was lunch time and Dan had an hour break. Most of the teachers were chatting in the teachers lounge, but not Kyle.

The two were in Kyle's car.

"I wanted to ask you a question." Kyle told him nervously picking as his fingernails.

"Yeah?" He asked looking to Kyle. Unlike himself Kyle went along with the other teachers in his dress. Except on him Dan found it cute. But then again he found everything cute, clothing was no different.

"Will you go out with me?" He asked his face a bright red.

"Of course you idiot!" Dan almost shouted in the small car.

He then leaned into Kyle, connecting their lips. He knew that it was risky. If they got Dan would surly be fired. But dan didn't give a fuck. Love conquered the fear.

"I fucking love you."

---

I found a fucking suicide note I was going to leave him and that just fucking destroyed me. I actually hate myself. Like it's not when people r like "omg I'm the worst haha" no it's like I'm actually a terrible person and just like all around in just such a bad person. I fucking despise myself and how weak I've gotten

Just ignore me plz I just not having it anymore

If you're ever having a bad day plz check out the link in my bio. It's beautiful and I have yet to watch it without getting teary eyed.

Ily