Chapter Twenty Two

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“Shouldn’t we go after them?” Jonah asks cautiously.  Tobias eyes shoot him and his idea down.

“We’re all too weak to chase after them.” I say, softening the hard atmosphere. “And plus, knowing Samuel, he had a backup plan, and there is no way we’ll be able to keep up with that man, even if we do miraculously find him here.”

“She’s right. And we need to get you sorted out.” Tobias says, the first bit to Jonah and the second part to me. At the remembrance of my new injury the pain kicks in again and I wince. Tobias brushes my cheek with the back of his hand then moves his hand down my body to my hand where it stays.  “Jonah, can you help her?”

“Erm, not really. I’m not allowed to, I’m only in training.” He replies.

“I really don’t mind.” I try to keep my voice strong but the more blood my leg loses the more my voice weakens and so does my eyesight.   

“Look, either do it or get someone else quickly.” Tobias says harshly.

Jonah nods, intimidated by Tobias’ severe dauntless ways, and says “Oh course, Sir. While I am gone I would advise you to put pressure on the wound and elevate it.” He reminds me of a hurt little child and I make a note to scold to Tobias about it later but for now I just give him a short look. Tobias loosens his grip on my hand and stares at the floor.

“Thanks.” Tobias mumbles as Jonah starts to leave the room once again.  Jonah nods and then he disappears from view behind the door. The pain is starting the get unbearable once again, I look pleadingly at Tobias, his eyes meet mine and the pain is not the main focus of my thoughts anymore. His eyes pull me in and it’s magnetic. We start to lean in, my leg screams in pain, stopping me so I lay back down and Tobias keeps moving towards me. In a few seconds, we’re sharing the same air, our lips so close that there are less than millimetres between us. The temptation of his soft lips calling me, like the death serum in the bureau weapons room calling me to give up on life. Finally, our lips collide, the hunger too much. We’ve been apart for what seems like years which was only a couple of days. Those couple of days, where I dreamed that he died, watched his best friend die and found out that someone I trusted was willing for my death and turned out to be my brother, meaning that my mother had kept yet another thing from me.  There’s a suction in my heart as I remember Zeke, I remember  that Tobias doesn’t know. I don’t notice that Tobias’ kisses have become hardly anything and his eyes are open, staring into mine, so near.

“Tobias. I need to talk to you about something.” I whisper, dreading my next words.

“Wh..what about? Can’t we do it later?” He worriedly asks. Can I tell him later? No, I need tell him, he needs to know.

“No, no, we need to talk now. This is important.” I say. “Look, this is hard for me to tell you.”

“Can I stop you right there? Are you breaking up with me? Because I’m begging you, don’t do this, please.” There’s aching in his eyes as bad as the agony in his words. His eyes search mine, like he’s fearing the next few seconds.

I hold his face in my left hand and I quickly say, “I would never do that. You mean more to me than anything else I’ve ever known.  To lose you would be like losing my soul and just living in an empty body.”

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