Paint Swatch Poems

Poem #41// A Year of Silence

I parted all ties to you,
When I finally could take no more.
I told you to leave and never come back,
That I did not need you anymore.
I was better without you; I became something more.

After a year of silence,
You have returned to me now that I need you again.
I cried out at night and you were the only one at my side,
Comforting me in the darkness.
I have become less again; I need you to make me whole.

I can feel your presence lurking evermore,
In the shadows and when it's bright.
You are standing there to protect me from them,
To tell me the things that they dare not to.
I trust you with my all; I have come to depend on you.

All my feelings of old have returned,
The sinking of my heart and burning of my happiness.
The pain is the only thing left inside me,
And you are there to help me set it free.
I am fading away; I am out to get myself.

I can hear you when it happens and how it all affects you,
When my pain is finally released into the open.
The way you gasp for life when I suck in my own air.
The way your fingers grip my shoulders as my blade catches my skin.
I gave into all the darkness; I am weak like they made me.

I hate that you made me like this,
Yet it is impossible for me to stop.
You are the darkness that I beckoned to, the sadness that haunts me still,
Yet I do not let you go; I do not know how.
You give me my pain from your own and together now, we are bound.
I am the giver of your pain; I am the maker of my own.
~a.k.