Between the Days and Nights ✔

Chapter 12: OMG

Hey guys! Sorry it's a bit short. I was starting to get shy toward the end of the chapter so I stopped it there. Hope you like it!

-My

Tam

After the whole dramatic and passionate kiss that Damon and I shared, we left to talk in his car. As soon as my first yawn came up, he took it as a sign of exhaustion and started driving me home. As we arrive in front of the worn out building, he reaches for my hand, squeezing it. I look into his eyes, which almost glow under the reflection of a streetlight. Those beautiful green eyes always catch me off guard. His hair is still messy from having my fingers desperately grip onto them.

He walks me up to my front door, and while there was a twinge of guilt in the back of my mind, I couldn't be more glad to have him by my side. With him, I'm sure that I'm going to be content at the least, if not happy all the time. My hand in his, he pulls me in for the same embrace as the night of the party last week. It was familiar and reassuring, all while leaving me with my melted heart and my knees wobbly.

He cradles my head and kisses the top of it before gazing down at me with a sea of green. His eyes were overflowing with joy, and as he looks into mine, I feel them filling me with a sense of what I can only recognize as muted passion.

"Goodnight," he whispers as he kisses my forehead and gazes down at me, at my lips. I know he's expecting a true goodnight kiss on the lips, but that twinge of guilt in the back of my mind has finally grown enough to occupy the majority of my thoughts. I kiss him on the cheek and wave at him as he walks off awkwardly. I hope he didn't think that was too weird, full on making out with him in front of everybody and then only giving him a chaste kiss on the cheek when we're alone.

He probably thinks that was too weird.

I see him glance back with a puzzled look shown through his eyebrows.

He definitely thought that was really weird.

I turn around to open my door, slowly slipping inside with caution as to not make a sound. Once I managed to close both doors quietly, I lean my back on the wall adjacent to them, sliding down until I'm sitting while hugging my knees. My breathing is uneven and I can't get Silas out of my head. I think about his lips on someone else, where his hands were on her, how he looked when he saw me, and how he must have looked when he saw me kiss Damon.

I'm not mature enough to handle this situation and I don't like to think about one guy when I've somehow managed to make it semi-official with another, but I can't stop myself. Damon is fantastic and I can't wait to see where this goes, but I can't forget the excruciating pain I felt at the pit of my stomach as I saw Silas' lips on someone else.

It doesn't make sense. It's not like he was mine, but I somehow allowed my heart to make him mine anyway. All he did was prove otherwise.

It's best, I decide, to act normal and still accept him as a friend. He's made his decision and in response, I've made mine. Maybe he wasn't really that into me anyway.

I crawl into bed, drained from the events of the day and crippled from the numbness that creeps around my mind, allowing it to finally give into the sweet and brief release that slumber offers. There won't be a visitor at my window tonight, I suddenly remember, and I could feel hot tears dampen the pillow that wraps around the side of my face.

~o~

The next morning, I went through the usual routine with my mom reserved for all Sunday mornings. It was particularly warm today, so I wore a plain deep red tank top and tucked it into a flowy white skirt with tiny flowers on it that my mom made me a couple months back. Because it was frowned upon for me to wear something sleeveless to church, I threw on an almost see-through beige kimono that I found at the swap-meet a month back to be a few sizes too large. When I got home that day, I tore all the edges and even added extra thread to it for the extra flare of volume in the fringes.