Between the Days and Nights ✔

Chapter 28: Midnight Call

Tam

"Can I get a ladle," Natasha asks as I swiftly run over to the right drawer to fetch her one. We're currently making crepes on a Wednesday morning during winter break. I had made plans with her several times over the last few weeks, but this time, she seems a bit more tense. I don't ask her about it, though. I don't want to press.

My mom is out of town, going on some Catholic retreat with her religious friends. Geez, I didn't realize how religious it sounded until she announced it to me the other night. Instead of making me go with her and a bunch of other middle aged people, she's left me a hundred dollars and trusted that I could take care of myself.

Thank god.

"So Silas came over and told you he still loves you?" She spoons some batter and pours it into the pan. "What did you tell him?"

"Nothing. I mean, I didn't even respond to that, really." I lean my lower back on the counter and stare at my hands.

"Bullshit. You had to have said something. Look at you," she points the ladle at me.

I purse my lips, trying to remember if I had said something. "No, really, I didn't respond to him saying that."

"Well how did you feel about it, though?" She turns back around to flip the crepe with the tip of her index finger and thumb. "Ah!"

"Are you okay," I rush over to peer at her perfectly cooked crepe.

"Yeah," she answers as she pulls the thing off the pan and slides it onto the cutting board that I had laid out beside the stove. "But answer my question."

I sigh.

How did I feel? I couldn't sleep properly for days. The only time I got some kind of freedom from it all was when I got to hang out with Damon, but even that got weird. He seemed different from when we went on our date last Saturday.

"Well?"

"I don't know," I mumble, staring at my hands again.

"So you still have feelings for him," she states and points at the empty crepe I'm supposed to be assembling.

I spread chocolate spread at the center and sprinkle fruits on top before folding it in. I place the whole thing on a pretty plate on the side and start working on the next.

"I didn't say that," I defend myself.

"But you meant it. You still feel for him. That's why you keep thinking about it. I mean, why else am I here, if not a distraction from your lover boy disaster?" She glides her finger along the knife covered in chocolate spread and licks it. "Face it, girl. You still love him."

"Okay, fine!" I feel tears welling up my eyes. "I still love him. But it's not like I can trust him after what happened."

I grip at the edge of the counter, trying to calm my breathing with my eyes closed.

I miss him so much.

"What if I told you that's not what happened?"

My head snaps up to stare at her, standing there with a smug face. She knows something and it's burning my insides that it could mean what I hope it means.

"What are you talking about," I ask as I stand up straight and turn to her.

"I saw something in Pam's locker once. It was a little dime bag with some pills."

"She's rich, Nat," I roll my eyes at her, "Rich people do drugs all the time."

"You know those little warning posters and ads that show date rape drugs at the clubs and stuff? I recognized those pills in her locker."