Right Now

12.

I step outside and he is already sitting in my yard with Douglas all over him. Ralph runs out of the kitchen and joins them. He looks up at me and smiles brightly. "Are you sure I can't have them?' He asks me.

"Certain. No joint custody either." I say and he huffs. "Now who looks like a toddler?" I ask him and his expression changes to a smirk as he looks down my body.

"Most definitely not you," He says and he smiles again. "Come on." He says and he jogs happily to my pool, leaving me with blushing cheeks and pulling the red and black flannel together. I follow him slowly and I walk up the steps.

He jumps in the water and it splashes my feet. I gasp at the sudden cold and step back as he pops back up.

I sit at the edge and Ralph runs past me and jumps in, paddling to the beautiful boy in the pool. "Are you not getting in?" He asks me.

"Uh, maybe in a minute." I say and he swims over to me.

"Are you scared, Em?" He asks me. He puts his wet hands on my bare thighs and looks up at me through dripping eyelashes and for once the cold doesn't bother me, I'm too distracted by his hands.

"Of course not, why would I have a pool if I were scared?" I ask, trying to play it off, because I am scared. But he sees through it. I wasn't exactly the best swimmer, even if the pool wasn't that deep.

"Come on," He says. He pushes my legs apart and he stands up straight, nearly eye level and he pushes the flannel off my shoulders, and then quickly pulls me into the water. I hiss as the water comes in contact with my body and I shiver. I keep my hands on his shoulders and he looks down at me. "Not so bad, is it?" He says softly.

"Yeah." I say. I don't like the way water slows me down, I feel closed in, like anything could get me, trapped. My grip tightens as I think if it.

"Whoa, please remove your finger nails from my shoulder. We are not in that stage, yet." He says, chuckling.

"Sorry." I say and blush again. I let my hands slide down to his forearms and I keep them there. He pulls me out more into the pool and the cold feeling begins to vanish and it replaced by a pleasant feeling.

"You know, if we are going to attempt to be friends, I gotta know some things about you." He says. "Like, the fact that you are scared of water. That would have been helpful. I wouldn't have asked to use your pool if I'd have known." He says.

"I guess, it's fine though," I say and shrug. He lets me go and I stand still. He pulls a floaty toward me and I quickly climb on, laying on my stomach and looking at him as he splashes the small dog with water, who tries to catch it with his mouth. "What do you want to know?'' I ask.

"A lot," He says and I roll my eyes. "Well, for starters, is there anything else you are afraid of?" He asks.

"Everything." I say and he snickers, shaking his head. "Hey, don't make fun. Everything is scary." I say.

"Yeah sure, you big baby." He says and shakes his head with a small smile.

"What about you?" I ask him.

"Not anything, really." He says. "Kinda numb to everything."

"How?" I ask him.

He turned and then scratches the side of his face. "I just stopped... feeling scared and all that, I guess, I don't know how." He says and his voice tenses so I drop it.

We talk for a while longer, watching the sunset from the water. He floats with his arms resting on my back, I feel his wet fingers drawing patterns on my side and it gives me chills.

***

We lay side by side in the grass as the moon and stars take over the sky. I look over at him and he has his eyes closed. "Hey, Calum?" I ask him and he gently opens his eyes to gaze over at me. The stars in the sky cannot compete with his eyes. "Why did you get mad at me today?"