Right Now

30.

I sit on my bed and I sigh, turning off my phone. I just wasn't having it with anyone. I turn the page in my book and I loose interest. I don't remember what I read, what it's about. I even have to flip the book over to remember what it's called. I close it and toss it across the room, it lands on the floor with a soft thud. I'm sure it wasn't that important in my English class

I stand and walk to my bathroom and and I take my toothbrush and my face wash, setting to work.

After I am finished, I walk back to my room and Calum standing in the middle in my room, his arms crosses and a furious look on his face. I was mad to see him there, considering he broke in through my window, which was wide open. I don't even know how the hell he managed that, but it adds to my list of reasons to be angry at him.

"What the hell are you dong in here?" I ask him.

"Don't ignore me. I fucking hate it." He says harshly, not moving from his spot, I don't move from mine. His expression shows that he is also upset, but probably not for the same reason I am.

"I can say the same thing." I say lowly and cross my arms.

He sighs, letting his arms droop. "Em, please d-" I stop him and I scowl.

"Don't say it isn't a big deal, Calum, or not to care. Don't you even dare. Don't tell me not to be mad!" I say loudly, but still trying to keep my voice quiet so not to wake my mother.

"But it's not." He says and sighs

"Yeah, it is. Sure, I would have been fine with it if you hadn't went off with her for as long as she did," I say and cross my arms. "You didn't even introduce me as your girlfriend, just Emily. Everything backfiring on me and I-" I feel my eyes sting as he cuts me off. Like I already said, how am I going to compete with her? If a girl like that wants something, how can a girl like me stop her?

"Whoa, wait, what? Backfiring how?" He asks and frowns.

I swallow the lump in my throat and look away from him before the words spill from my mouth. "Because I said I loved you. I knew as soon as I did, something would happen to wreck it because things were good. And I was right, here she came and she is so freaking pretty it's not fair and you liked her first and I know she is gonna take you back because you said something about a fresh start-" I stop myself and put my sweater sleeves to me eye to stop from crying. Everything I'd been keeping pent up about it for the last few hours rushes to the surface. He hurt my feelings a lot today, and it happens a lot more than I'd like to admit. I'm not going to cry. I've cried enough in the short amount of time that it makes me sick. I never cried like this before. i sit on the edge of my bed and take deep breaths to calm myself.

"Liked." He says softly. I feel him touch me and I step back, my legs hitting the bed and I sit down. "I love you, Emily, not her, believe it or fucking not. I wouldn't have said it if I didn't mean it. She wanted a fresh start, not me. I don't want her." He stands between my legs and hugs me to him, but I didn't hug him back.

"I know." I say and I sniffle. I feel pathetic and I feel like a mess. I shouldn't have said anything about it, should have kept quiet.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm not gonna leave." He says and I feel his fingers through my hair, pulling it all behind my shoulders and resting on my back. He tugs on a hand full, forcing me to look at him. "I promise. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. If it makes you feel any better, she asked if you were dating Michael and I said you were with me. We talked for a while about you." He says. I shake his hand away and stop looking at him, putting my face back into the sleeves of the hoodie.

That's going to make it all hurt worse.

He kneels down and peeks up at me from under my hands. "Please look at me, baby." He says. I look down at him and he kisses me softly. "Don't be mad at me. Please. I mean, I know you will be, but try not to be. I'm sorry, Emily" He says.

"Okay... Can I just... can you go home for tonight?" I ask him in a whisper. He nods and before I know it, he is jumping out my window.

***

I step out of the house the next morning feeling extra low as Ashton pulls into the driveway. He rolls down the window of his mom's car and smiles brightly. I get in and sigh as I watch the storm clouds roll in.

"So, how do you feel about the car wash Friday?" He asks as he pulls out into the street.

"Eh, it'll be okay," I say and shrug. "Not sure how much we'll make with it, but it's worth a shot. Kind of old-school, isn't it?"

He nods. "How do you feel about the other thing?" Ashton asks casually. I told him the small pieces I knew about Missy yesterday.

"Ash, it's fine. I might have overreacted to it. It's nothing. Talking with an old friend, that's all it was." After he left, I felt so stupid. I got so mad at myself for crying over something so little.

"Are you sure? it didn't feel like nothing to me." He says.

"Of course it is."

Calum

I knew as soon as Michael and Luke turned the corner I was in trouble. There is no smile to hold back this time. I took a step back as they both walked toward me with angry faces.

Luke reaches out with his left hand and Michael with his right and they both hit me one at a time, a slap on both cheeks. "What are you doing with my ship, you moron?" Luke says and I frown. "Messing this up would end you, because I would end you." He says and crosses his arms.

"Could you be any more dramatic?" I say and roll my eyes, holding my sore face in my hands. they hit hard.

"What did she want?" Michael narrows his eyes. Emily wasn't the only one ignoring me yesterday.

"She just wanted to say hi." I say timidly.

"Can't possibly be, this is a trap, a setup. Missy isn't one to just say hi, especially when it comes to prey." Michael gave me another angry look,=. He hated her more than anyone.

"I know." I say, because I know he is right. She isn't. It felt great to see her. It also hurt like hell. Next to my parents, she was the person that made me the way I was. Angry and unable to attach myself to someone. At least that's how I was until Emily.

"Luke, talk to Melody and ask her to snoop around Missy and see what this bitch is up to." Michael says and Luke nods. We all hear yelling and we walk down the hall. I see Lyle fighting someone and we rush toward him. He is fighting Charlie, and winning.

I see Emily with wide eyes before she rushes forward and moves between them. But it's too late, Charlie swings and instead of aiming high and hitting Lyle, I can almost swear he swings low on purpose. His fist connects with her face and she let's out a girlish shriek and covers her face.

I push past everyone and I punch him as hard as I can, sending him to the ground. I plant my foot in his chest. "Fucking hit my girlfriend again, and I'll kill you." I see Emily rush to the bathroom and I follow her as a teacher rushes onto the scene.

Inside, she is washing blood off her face and my heart breaks at the sight. "Baby, are you okay?" I ask as I walk over. She presses a paper towel to  her nose. I feel the need to break something as I see the redness surrounding her eye and her nose. "God, I'm so sorry."

"I'm fine." She says and I scowl. I know she is not. She has blood on her, a fresh bruise and tears lining her eyes and cheeks. That is not okay.

"I swear to God, I'm gonna a kill him. I'm gonna kill him and he won't-" I stop myself and take a deep breath and she places a hand on my cheek

"It's my fault for getting in the way. I'm gonna be okay." She says, patting my cheek, turning back to the sink. She felt different today, I couldn't place my finger on it.

"Yeah, but he isn't." We both turn and see Lyle standing in the doorway. He looks exhausted. 

"Can we talk after school?" He asks her and she nods and he leaves again without saying a word.

"A man of many words." I mutter and take the paper towel from her, wiping a drop of blood off her chin. "Oh my lord. I am so mad right now." I mutter.

"I love you.'' She says with a serious look and I smile, unsure of what else to do.

"I love you, too." I say.