I Love You, Prof.

Chapter Five : Keirah Eunice

It was barely nine-thirty in the evening and I was in my room that night. Suddenly, the door opened as I am getting ready to bed.

"Hey Sheiia!" Expect that Keirah Eunice doesn't know the essence of knocking on the door before entering the room that is not hers.

"Bakit Ate?" Mabibilang lamang sa mga daliri ang mga pagkakataong kausapin ako ng sarili kong kapatid. I wonder what she's doing in my room right at this moment.

"I just want to inform you that you'll commute in going to school starting tomorrow because Manong Louie will drive for me. I have an out of town business conference for three days."

If only not because of her evil smirk, I would assume that she's asking my permission to have Manong Louie drive her to her conference but well, what can I expect from Keirah Eunice? I let out a deep sigh. Alam ko naman na more on nang-iinis lang ito.

"Sure Ate." Sinabayan ko pa iyon ng ngiti. Hindi na siya sumagot pa. Instead, she gave me a sharp look. Walang lingon-likod itong lumabas ng aking kwarto at pabagsak na isinalya ang pinto, leaving me with a heavy heart. Hanggang kelan ko ba dapat intindihin at tanggapin ang pakikitungo sa akin ng Daddy at Ate ko? I feel like I don't belong here anymore at isa lang akong malaking sampid sa pamilyang ito. Noong una, akala ko galit lang sila sa kasalanang hindi ko naman talaga ginawa, pero kahit ilang taon na ang lumipas wala pa ring nagbago sa pakikitungo nila sa akin. Hindi ko na rin alam kung ano bang dapat kong patunayan sa kanila para magbago ang pakikitungo nila sa akin.

Actually, we used to be close lalo na nung bata pa ako. She's so protective towards me, silang dalawa ni Kuya Gid. Until that day when she thought that I betrayed her. Three years has passed pero nararamdaman kong sariwa pa rin sa kanya ang lahat ng mga nangyari. If only I could turn back the time, I will do everything for her to see that I never did anything to hurt her.

Kanina pa ako pabiling-biling sa higaan pero hindi pa rin ako makatulog. I decided to go downstairs and get myself a warm milk. Baka sakaling makatulog ako pag uminom ako ng gatas. May klase pa ako bukas at ayaw kong malate sa hapagkainan for breakfast. Baka kasi ano na naman ang marinig ko kay Dad.

I was in the kitchen making myself a milk to drink on when I saw my Ate Keirah going towards where am I. A disgusted look is all over her beautiful face. Pakiramdam ko, habang buhay nang magiging ganito ang timpla ng mukha niya kapag kaharap ako.

"So, how was your first day in school?" Binuksan nito ang ref at kumuha ng fresh milk. Hindi na rin nito inabala pa ang sariling initin pa ang gatas at agad na iyong ibinuhos sa baso. I was surprised since ngayon lang ito nagtanong sa akin kung kumusta ako.

 "Okay lang Ate. Nag-aadjust pa naman ako pero alam ko masasanay din ako sa environment ko." I tried to sound polite and cautious. Baka kasi may masabi akong masama na ikagalit nito. Kahit alam kong mabigat ang dugo niya sa akin, hangga't maari ayokong magtalo kami. Kung kanina ay disgust ang nakikita ko sa mukha nito, ngayon naman ay poker faces ito nang magtanong.

"Well, that's good to hear. Just don't mess up again, sister." Nawala yung poker face niya, instead napalitan ito ng matatalim na tingin. It feels like she's sending me daggers through her eyes.

Ito na naman yung panunumbat niya. Sa ilang taon na lumipas, andito pa rin pala ang sakit everytime na pinapakita niya sakin na hindi na magbabago pa yung paniniwala niya sa nangyari three years ago.

"Don't worry Ate. I won't mess up. Ever since naman kasi talaga, wala naman akong kasalanan. I was just set up. But I know that you won't believe me anymore cause you want someone to blame. And that someone is me."

After three long years, ngayon lang uli kami nagkausap nang ganito kalapit. Matagal na panahon na rin niya akong sinisisi sa bagay na hindi ko naman kasalanan. A part of me wants to understand my sister, but this is just too much to bear. Sobra na kasi, na lahat nang kilos ko mali sa paningin nila. Na sarili kong pamilya, ang tingin sakin ay traidor. Yung kahit anong pakiusap ko, sarado ang puso nila na makinig. They never bother to gave me a chance to explain and defend myself.

 "Really, Sheiia? Wow, someone to blame huh? Yes, I'm blaming you. Because it is entirely your fault. Everything was because of you. You alone, you hear me? You and no one else! You made me miserable and for that, I will never ever forgive you. Never Sheiia. Always remember that."

Hatred and resentment can be seen in her face. Napahigpit ang hawak ko sa baso ng aking gatas, para bang doon ako makakakuha ng lakas para hindi manghina sa sakit ng mga salitang binabato sa akin ng kapatid ko.

"It's not what you think, Ate! Kailanman hindi kita niloko o pinagtaksilan. I will never do such things to you!" Parang yung sakit na kinimkim ko ng sobrang tagal, ngayon lang lumabas lahat.

"But you did! Yes, you did! Don't make me look like I'm dumb. Hindi ako tanga, Sheiia. I saw it with my two eyes. You did!" Gone was my sister who used to cuddle with me before we sleep. Wala na yung ate kong palagi akong pinagtatanggol sa mga umaapi sa akin. Lahat ng pagmamahal ay napalitan na lahat ng galit at pagkamuhi. 

"What happened to us, Ate? You promised me that we'll be bestfriends forever." I broke down. Nabitawan ko ang basong hawak ko at napahilamos ng mukha. Yung tapang na akala ko meron ako, bigla nalang nawalang parang bula. Three years, pero parang kahapon lang ang lahat.

"Why don't you ask yourself, Sheiia? What happened to us? And about that promise? Of all people, you should be the one to know why are we like this. Well, it must be true that promises are made to be broken. Because you broke your promise the moment you betrayed me. See, I'm still miserable. The pain is still here. And I hope that you'll never be happy as long as I'm not."

Bago pa ito tuluyang makatalikod sa akin ay nakita kong nagpahid ng luha ang Ate ko. Alam ko naman na hanggang ngayon ay nasasaktan pa rin siya sa nangyari. Ramdam ko naman, at nasasaktan din ako. Ang gusto ko lang naman, sana pakinggan nila ako. Na sana bigyan nila ako ng chance to explain what really happened. One chance, a little chance but it seems so impossible for them to give me that only thing I've been wishing for so long. Tahimik akong napaupo sa sahig at napaiyak nang mahina.

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A/N:

  Sabaw. Hahaha. Sorry, I'm also in a confused state right now. Peace. ✌✌