For you

Poem 21: How the hell do I move on?

Lately I've been waking up in pure bliss after having "the dream".

If you've been through what I have you know what I mean.

The dream where the man you love and the loved one you lost,

Come back into your life and you see what you caused.

So here is what I wonder when I wake up from these dreams.

Here is what haunts me and makes me want to scream.

When I wake up after feeling his embrace,

How the hell do I forget him when he left but not without a trace.

How the hell do I move on?!

When every single thing in this world seems wrong.

But the only thing that seems right is our song.

You say I ruined your life and I'm the reason you turned to drugs.

But believe me when I say when I see you my heart tugs.

My heart broke when you said those words.

The ones that cut my very soul like that of 10,000 swords.

I want to move on dear God I do!

But why is it so wrong to move on without you?!

You became a piece of me and a very large piece at that.

I remember our first kiss, the one behind your hat.

So now I ask you one more time,

"Why the hell do you make me rhyme"?

The answer is simple, and we both know it's true.

Then, Now, and Forever I feel like I'll always love you.

He's a really great man believe me he is.

But he isn't the one who I gave my first kiss.

So answer me this please don't make me cry,

Would it even hurt you if I died?

I know, I know I've heard you say it before.

If you kill yourself it's your fault you had it in store.

But here's all I have left to say.

You knew how to take my breath away.

So wouldn't it be right if you did it once more?

Only this time maybe a coffin would be in store.

How the hell do I forget our first dance on a Summers eve.

You threatened to beat him up when he picked on me.

I'm sorry, you're right.

And of course I am wrong.

Maybe your love for me wasn't that strong.

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Hey guys,
I am so so sorry.
But I've been super busy and I just needed to vent.

-B