For you

Poem 16: A little too much

A/N:
Hey.... I named this poem after the song I used. Lately I've been loving Shawn Mendes' music it's really speaking to me right now. So I don't think any of you actually read these but how should I know. Anyway, I haven't written in a while because lately I've just been burying everything deeper inside. Um well anyway.. Here's the late update.. IM me with any comments if you want or even if you just want to talk. Also this chapter was really personal I mean they all are.. But it's special to me..... So yeah...

-B

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Damn it. I sigh.

I just want to kiss you and cry.

I can't bear all of these memories on my own.

I can't bear this feeling of being so alone.

You were my rock you helped keep me strong.

God, why the hell does everything seem so wrong?!

I wish I could hate you.

I wish I could forget you too.

But I can't I fucking can't.

I'm past the point of breaking.

And I hate begging you but my heart is aching.

Her name.

The name forever etched on my heart driving my mind insane.

Small fingers, tiny toes.

Things that only she and I know.

But she's gone your gone.

Like the midnight rain at dawn.

When did we grow up?

Was it that night?

Or was it when we had our first fight?

I love you so much being without you is like clinging on for dear life.

I messed up. God I messed up so bad.

I don't think you get it that I'm really sad.

Or you do and you don't care.

I just can't think of that. I won't it's too much and I'm scared.

Hold me, rock me in your arms.

Kiss my cheek keep me safe from all harms.

I'd choose you all over again.

Maybe you could've chosen me then.

All this guilt this doubt this worry. It buries me...

Why can't you just see that I'm so fucking sorry?!