(j) I Love You

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It hurts

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It hurts. It hurts reading those vile comments from his haters that mainly consist of making fun of your appearance and weight. You kept pretending it doesn't bother you, even going as far as to address those spiteful comments on your twitter or via YouTube video and you were met with overwhelming support – though, it all pales in comparison. The human brain is just funny like that, it tends to remember and relive painful moments with the most heart-breaking detail. Hate leads to self-doubt and self-doubt leads to...more hate. It stacks up. Things just...stack up on top of you and you feel crushed by their words, by their taunts and it hurts. It hurts.

But it hurts Sean more seeing you so distressed, so apathetic and cold when he knows perfectly well that your insides are boiling and it pains him knowing there is absolutely nothing he can do about it. He watches you watch your favorite show on HBO without that magnificent glow on your cheeks or the bright sparkle in your eye. He gulps, thinking of what to say, what to do, how to even approach you. Perhaps he is overthinking...he always overthinks when it has something to do with you. And so he acts on his first instinct – his hand cups your cheek, bringing your face closer (a flash of surprise on your part, though you don't pull away) and lands a soft kiss on your lips, one that warmth's you from within and makes your heart swell.

"You, Ana," He addresses you fully though quietly, making sure each and every word is laced with affection, "are the love of my life and that will never, ever, change. Now...all I want is for you to remember that, but most of all I need you to remember that I can't love you alone. You have to love yourself too."

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