* Hoseok's POV *
Shit. This was the only word coming to my mind when suddenly tea was on the table. I got up to get some tissues to clean it up. Maybe also because I didn't really want to talk about what happened earlier when I was at Taehyung's to.. talk.
To be honest, I couldn't really explain why I couldn't just tell Yoongi what happened. I don't know, the thought of it just felt.. wrong? And I didn't know how he'd react to what happened, he'd probably think I was overreacting. Which I wasn't - what happened earlier with Taehyung didn't even affect me that much, it was just.. the things I was connecting with what happened earlier.
For example Jimin. Who I missed really much and who made me think of never falling for someone ever again because in the end, I would just be left by everyone and I'd be drowining in pain. You probably wonder what happened with Taehyung, right?
Well, he kind of.. Confessed to me I guess? I thought he wanted to talk with me about somthing really important and I wanted to help him since I needed help too sometimes and I didn't want to have him broken but I just ended up being pushed against a wall, kissed by no other than Taehyung. Which made me so confused and even more confused when he told me he fell for me even though we knew each other for.. not a long time but he felt certain cheesy things when I was around et cetera.
And I basically started crying because I was so confused and it was kind of too much for me to handle especially because I couldn't return the feelings and I knew I'd hurt him with that. Tears built up in my eyes and then I started connecting thoughts and just started crying even more. Well, that's all of it. Why was I struggling so much to tell Yoongi?
I looked at the boy sitting in front of me. I wondered what he was thinking right now and what he was struggling with. Everyone was struggling with something, even if it was the smallest things. I didn't believe anyone was completely content with everything happening around or inside of them.
I opened my mouth, wanting to simply tell Yoongi what happened but suddenly, my throat became dry and I couldn't say anything and I honestly didn't know why. Maybe I just didn't want to hurt Yoongi? But why would I think that it would hurt him? I didn't think it would but.. it was still possible...
I threw the thought away, locking it inside a small room inside of my mind and I tried talking again.
"Taehyung kissed me. That was how my 'being lost in my thoughts' began, kind of. Then he.. confessed to me and I realized I couldn't return the feelings because I just didn't and I told myself to never fall ever again."
I saw Yoongi frowning, but I kind of shut it out. I didn't say anything else though. And he just opened his mouth and shut it close again, then he nodded. I was a bit confused about his actions to be honest, did he care that much or did he just not want to say something because of.. reasons I'd never know?
I decided to not think about that and wait until he would say something, but that didn't happen. He just stared at me and I stared back.
After a five minute staring contest, Yoongi broke the silence. "And what is Taehyung doing right now?", he asked. I shrugged. "Don't know, but I think he's home and.. Ah, do you think I should go back to him?"
He shook his head. "No, I'm not saying that.. I mean, you don't have to and you can.. stay at my apartment if you want to? You did that once so.."
As a response, I nodded, acvepting the nice offer he made me. "I'd really like to, thank you", I said and he smiled at me. He had a really cute gummy smile, I noticed. He was really cute in general, but.. he was just cute, nothing more.
At least this was what I told myself.
Later, he even allowed me to sleep in his bed with him; we ended up cuddling and it was really good. I didn't feel that much body warmth and comfort in - it felt like it had been years. I was really happy to have him beside me. Yoongi was always so nice to me. Maybe he was the one who could save me. And if I was falling, maybe he'd be the one to catch me.
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okay honestly this and the next chapter will be shit but i have so many ideas to continue the story that i don't know how ahh
YOU ARE READING
kiss me | 솝
Fanfiction[ "My biggest mistake was to think that I never could fall." ] Yoongi, who works in a small coffee shop in Seoul, gets interested in a costumer and wants to get to know him.
